It's been a few days, and we have spent many hours on the phone with J. As the quiet son, it is hard for talkative parents to get much out of him, and for him to get his thoughts out. This morning, after yet another restless night praying off and on as the hours passed, I am unable to shake off my misgivings about where he is choosing to go. Much of these are borne from his own comments against the place, for a variety of reasons, including doctrine. I know I should be happy that he wants to get into the Word, and learn, and get training for the ministry. I wish we felt as though we were sending him out of our home with our blessing. If not for the doctrinal issues, and his own fault-finding, we might have been able to do this. I know I am just babbling but I really need to vent to someone about this. We are all pretty burnt out from the trials of life we've been dealing with. I am holding onto Rom. 8:28 for dear life, again. I am so thankful for the precious promises of God in His Word.

Earlier today we learned how we are percieved by someone and that has filled in many gaps for us. It explains the why behind the feeling of being tolerated that we have during visits. That is hard to take. And it is pretty humbling, and humiliating to know that people feel justified to point out things in your life, when they don't really know you at all.

Please pray for our family. Pray for my husband as the head and father of this family--for wisdom and grace, and that all the fruits of the spirit would be manifested in his life for all to see; for me that I will be able to keep it together until we get over this wave that is over my head right now, that I will be able to forgive the hurt and pain inflicted by people involved, and not hold a grudge against them for their judgement of us; for our children that they will be grow to be godly men and women giving their very lives in service to God, and will not allow the failings of their parents, and the stupidity of our mistakes, mar them or cause them to grow bitter towards us, or others.

I feel like a part of my private life has been invaded, and trust that was broken will take many years to restore. God is able to heal the brokenness. My heart is broken. I am extremely hurt and upset by the revelations of this afternoon.

And I am feeling betrayed by some I love deeply because they have misplaced their loyalty.

Pray for me. Pray for us. God has blessed us greatly and He is good to us, and I know that in the end we will see the good in this occurrance, but at the moment the wounds are too raw for me to feel anything but resentment, pain, fear, uncertainty, anger. Though it would do me no good at all, I want to hang someone out to dry, royally. Pray for me. Pray for us.

Treasures of My Heart.

Last Saturday was the biggest event in our family in a LONG time. It was a first for us--our oldest son got married. His wife is a dear sweet girl who I feel more like I've adopted.My affection for her is above in-law quality.

Always the weepy one, I was half a bucket of tears for days before we left, and of course, at rehearsal, and the ceremony.

The spirit of God fairly oozed out the windows and doors during the ceremony. Many, many prayers had been offered on their behalf for this important occassion, as well as the months of difficulty, testing, and trials they endured to reach the altar.

All I could do was praise the LORD for redemption, mercy, grace. He is so kind and sweet to us, and seeing the two lovebirds gazing intently into one anothers eyes, not another soul was in the room to them, it overwhelmed me. I do not deserve such blessing and joy. IT is just too good. God is TOO good to me. And I am ashamed at how often I take it for granted, take Him for granted.

Please visit our site at www.boazbaptist.com/ and click on the photo of the newlyweds to see wedding photos. If you scroll down to David sitting in the wagon, at less than 2 years of age, click on him to be taken to our video page to view "A Perfect Gift" which is the title of the slideshow that opened the floodgates and so many memories came rushing at me.

My heart if full with these thoughts of making the most of the moments we have. We can only live for the now. We can't plan to do, or go, or be. All we have is this second to breathe and do our best for Jesus sake. Do all to His glory and you'll never regret it.

Now go grab some kleenex before you click away from here.

6 Days Until the Wedding

There are many other things I should probably be doing. Where have you heard that before? Perhaps as you read this you are thinking the same thing. But I need to take a break and put my thoughts into words.

We are all getting super excited here. The countdown, which began in January, is almost finished. By this time next week, our family will have grown one member larger. My hubby was teasing me, at first, that this was the easiest labor I'd ever have, and this "birth" would be pain-free. I won't go that far. It's been easy, but my new daughter...I can't think of enough things to say about her. She is absolutely head-over-heels in love with our son, and she loves the LORD and trusted the LORD to bring her prince charming to her in His time. If she hadn't waited THIS wedding would not be taking place at all.

All this past week I have just been a bundle of emotions. One moment I am caught up in the excitment of a wedding, in our family. Then the very next I find myself wondering if I will make it through the ceremony and after without blubbering like a baby. Hey, I can watch total strangers get married, and I tear up. I've kidded my sister about bringing a case of kleenex, and we've agreed not to look at each other until after they are pronounced husband and wife.

This new season of life, is being entered at a far higher speed than I'd ever imagined. Back when my lambs were under age 13, we often pondered how the LORD would bring them a spouse. My faith was pretty big the day I stated that God would bring them to our front door if necessary. There was no need to fret, or hunt for him/her. And if God does it, you'll know it.

Little did I know then, just how much truth I had spoken. But that is a story...ok....there are 2 stories...for another day.

As I said I shoudl be doing other things, and since I have cleared my head a bit, I am going to set about getting to it.

Pray for the LORD to bless the newlyweds as they embark on a wondrous, lifelong journey.