Saturday, December 27, 2008
Monday, December 8, 2008
UNWORTHY
Good Morning~Sisters,
Today is sort of grey and dreary out...actually typical of spring in this part of PA.
Mother's Day here was very sweet. A few days before we went to Walmart and Na (8yr) wanted his "hundreds money". (They get 25 cents per 100% on weekly quizzes-the biggs get 50 cents bcz it is MUCH harder to earn those 100%) I watched him at the jewelry counter and tried to not really look at what he was doing. Since he didn't give me any of his change I knew he spent all he had. JOy purchases were done. On Sat. Na gave me a little silk flower ring to wear-it was my crown-he said. Sunday morning, no breakfast in bed, but I was escorted downstairs with my eyes covered, and in the living room were many balloons and packages and envelopes. Bob likes to do things like celebrations and special days as part of our church service, and since it is just us, we can. So, the children came one at a time to give their card, gift, hugs etc. I was showered with gifts and praise. Feeling truly unworthy of the love given to me. Joy presented me with a little bear and on the bag it was in said "it's a queen" (they call me the queen). Inside was a wally world gift card, very pretty for Mother's day (MY children collect gift cards from the checkout trash cans) Imagine my surprise when I said how pretty it was and Joy says, "It's NOT fake either, it's REAL" Bless her heart she put her last $5 on it. Bob made Na wait til last. I knew his was "the biggie" then, but I was totally surprised...It was a little dog with a gift box, inside the gift box was a pair of gold 14K earrings. He spent all he had on me. Later he told me "the earrings and money are like nothing bcz I love you so much" My heart just melted, again. Even later in the day, every few hrs that afternoon, someone was giving another present. What an encouragement but at the same time I just felt ohhhhh sooooo unworthy. I started to think about it all on Monday and it reminded me of the story of Jesus and the alabaster box. HE WAS WORTHY! But how loved, beloved, he must have felt. She gave her all, and kissed his feet and washed them with her tears... My children, in my heart, did this to me too. The difference being He is WORTHY of all praise honor and glory of course, but I am not.
Today is sort of grey and dreary out...actually typical of spring in this part of PA.
Mother's Day here was very sweet. A few days before we went to Walmart and Na (8yr) wanted his "hundreds money". (They get 25 cents per 100% on weekly quizzes-the biggs get 50 cents bcz it is MUCH harder to earn those 100%) I watched him at the jewelry counter and tried to not really look at what he was doing. Since he didn't give me any of his change I knew he spent all he had. JOy purchases were done. On Sat. Na gave me a little silk flower ring to wear-it was my crown-he said. Sunday morning, no breakfast in bed, but I was escorted downstairs with my eyes covered, and in the living room were many balloons and packages and envelopes. Bob likes to do things like celebrations and special days as part of our church service, and since it is just us, we can. So, the children came one at a time to give their card, gift, hugs etc. I was showered with gifts and praise. Feeling truly unworthy of the love given to me. Joy presented me with a little bear and on the bag it was in said "it's a queen" (they call me the queen). Inside was a wally world gift card, very pretty for Mother's day (MY children collect gift cards from the checkout trash cans) Imagine my surprise when I said how pretty it was and Joy says, "It's NOT fake either, it's REAL" Bless her heart she put her last $5 on it. Bob made Na wait til last. I knew his was "the biggie" then, but I was totally surprised...It was a little dog with a gift box, inside the gift box was a pair of gold 14K earrings. He spent all he had on me. Later he told me "the earrings and money are like nothing bcz I love you so much" My heart just melted, again. Even later in the day, every few hrs that afternoon, someone was giving another present. What an encouragement but at the same time I just felt ohhhhh sooooo unworthy. I started to think about it all on Monday and it reminded me of the story of Jesus and the alabaster box. HE WAS WORTHY! But how loved, beloved, he must have felt. She gave her all, and kissed his feet and washed them with her tears... My children, in my heart, did this to me too. The difference being He is WORTHY of all praise honor and glory of course, but I am not.
That sum's up my Mother's Day 2006. Each year I don't know what to expect, and usually I expect some cards, and The LORD always has surprises in store for me, above measure. Thank You Jesus!
Friday, December 5, 2008
Today has already been a busy one. Last night I assisted Bob in setting up our “sound system” for church. Definitely not your usual sound system.
Since none of us are proficient enough musically to play for anything but practice and pleasure, right now—pray for us, we use what folks in the Cincinnati, Ohio area called “canned music”. What you never heard of canned music?
Anyone ever see a can of “Florida Sunshine”? They were quite popular souvenirs, at least in the early to mid 1970’s. (Dating myself now, right?) They usually had a pretty label showing an orange, or orange tree, a sunshine face, or the mascot “Orange Bird”. http://ts3.images.live.com/images/thumbnail.aspx?q=198101837306&id=d90d3a9159a3c8637f23a6ac2bcda10e
Obviously they were nothing more than an empty can with a label.
That’s what I thought canned music was--something like that, but not like it at all.
Turns out that canned music is music used for singing that is taped, not live music. It was unpopular, ok, hated, by almost every church we set foot in. People far and wide would say “we don’t want no canned music in our church”.
Dave M. and Mrs. P and Mrs. M , often sang using cued music on tape which they purchased from the local Christisan bookstore in MD. None of them, the tapes, were offensive. The music was orchestra-like, not band music. These were probably predecessors to contemporary music as we know it today.
As time marches on, the world has infiltrated the church. Instead of being “in the world, not of the world”, we just modify, or “Christianize” things of the world, so we can indulge the flesh, remain popular, not sacrifice, not old fashioned, and be inoffensive to the world.
There is a poem or tract about the church dancing with the world. Its very true, and that’s sad to me.
Thus the musical tracks that Christian singers used to use, are far removed from those today. The background music drowns out the singers voice. Instead of hearing the words, and letting them minister to the spirit, the music overpowers the spirit and feeds the flesh.
Which leaves churches with little or no musical talent in their congregation little choice, and they are forced to chose between using worldly, fleshly music, or off key-wrong note-no music. People look forward to music in church. It sets the mood for the service. Could this by the reason why more contemporary churches use contemporary music or praise and worship music, but the depth of preaching and teaching which delves into the Word of God is missing?
Since we move in the old fashioned, traditional, KJV Baptist circles, the churches we visited were struggling to survive and remain true to their values, convictions and the Holy Spirit.
That’s why they hate canned music.
In Ohio, there is a dear older couple who adopted us when we first relocated to Harrison. Bob and Bro. H. disagree on issues, and they sharpen iron together, but at the end of each conversation, there is still love, friendship and respect. Bro. H. is one of the folks who hates canned music.
Bob’s been working on digitizing all our music tapes for almost 2 weeks. Our tape collection began 32 years ago when Bob got saved. There are music tapes and sermons, Bible studies, and revival music. It is much harder than it seems like it should be. Bob must play each tape at normal speed, and had been pumped full of Godly music daily. Much of the music we own can never be replaced. Voices change over time. People die or stray from the LORD. He feels like it is his duty to preserve this legacy for us, our children, our grandchildren, and anyone else with whom we might share it.
Well, while he is taping, and needs to catch a break, he will make phone calls. He decided to call up Bro. H. During their conversation, Bob explained to him that we use our music tapes for church every week. We have 2 sets of tapes that are just piano playing hymns so we can sing hymns with music. The first thing Bro. H said was, “I hate that ole canned music!” Bob, ever the hopeful man that he is, wanted to see if he could show him that “not all canned music is alike” (I just heard the Hebrew National Hot Dog voice saying “We answer to and even higher authority”)
Bob pulled up Abigail Miller’s file, and played a song for him. He like it. So Bob put another good one on, and he liked that. The piece’ de resistance’ was Dave Arnold. Now that tape is from 1981-1982. Bro. Arnold was a friend of our pastor, and preached at our revival. Bro. Arnold also sings, well he did then. He is a good Bro. and terrific preacher. When he set up his table with his tapes, I wanted one badly but didn’t have the money. He let me take a tape and I promised to pay for it late. (Which I did.) Several years later he made another tape. Evangelist Dave Arnold has always, and will always be near and dear to my heart because of his trusting me with his tape. He was the first person I ever heard sing “Rejoice in the LORD” and I fell in love with that song, right then. It is still one of my favorite songs. Bro. H. liked it too. Bob may have converted him to being pro-old-fashioned, Godly canned music when you haven’t got any musicians.
We are going to try to figure out how to share our treasure trove of music. When we do I’ll let you know how, when, and where.
David has been calling us a lot more frequently, and in the weeks since his birthday things have been changing between him and Bob. It’s wonderful. A few of the phone calls, I just wanted to run around the yard jumping and shouting praises to God. The other night was especially dear, because I had decided to use my favorite photo of David and I for my profile picture on facebook. He was 2-3 months old when it was taken. I’d barely uploaded it when he phoned, and we had such sweet fellowship, and my David, the real one, was back. His heart is back in the place it should be. It’s hard to believe it has been just 9 months since the day we thought he was completely ruining his life, but God didn’t allow it, and rerouted him.
For so long he was here but his heart was estranged from us. Now he is away from us but his heart is ever so close-he is home in the truest sense of the word.
Instead of not wanting to talk to us, we have been on the phone for hours, chatting about nothing in particular. But other calls are of a serious nature and he has opened up to us in a way we had only dreamed about. Especially with Bob. Bob and David were inseparable for, oh.. wow… forever…until we allowed David to work for another man we knew. From then on, Bob was 2nd best. David’s heart was stolen. He was 12 or 13 at the time. It grew worse, and David began to resent his Daddy-his Daddy who up to then was everything to him. Bob didn’t see it right away, but I did, and it hurt.
The contrast is dramatic, like light v. darkness. An open heart after being so tightly closed, it is as if he is bursting at the seams to let all the bottled up good stuff burst out.
Lately he has been seeing Daddy in a whole new light; the light he should have been in all along. But better late than never. In face, he has really begun to look up to him, rather like he did as a little laddie. It is very sweet and endearing. The strain between them was hard on me, but I didn’t realize how hard until the weight has lifted. My cup is overflowing and I’m drinking from the saucer!!!
With being 21 now, he is really praying hard for a wife. He wants the woman God has for him, and desires with all his heart to go about things the right way. Please pray from him in this, and that if God doesn’t bring his spouse along anytime soon, that David will be patient and trust the LORD.
Well, it looks like all I have done is talk 2 of the important men in my life, hehehehehehe What a blessing to talk of them with joyfulness instead of sorrow, or worry.
This week we are planning our holiday get-away, and baking, projects. David may be home the week of the 25th so we can have some time here before we head to MD to be with my sister(s) and parents.
Over Thanksgiving, it was strange David being away-his first away from home. My sister, April, didn’t come either, but we got together Fri. and talked some things out. Charlene was missed. My parents were here, and that always makes it feel like Thanksgiving bcz we’ve done it for years.
School has been hard this week. Every day has been chaotic and we seem to struggle with getting to it. Plus, all 3 are struggling with their math right now. It will be nice to have only one struggle at a time, instead of them lining up for help. BUT I wouldn’t have it any other way, even when I feel it is making me totally insane.
Charity was hired to sew up a few jumpers. She is happy about that. She also was blessed because she got a pair of expensive clogs that tore right away, and the company replaced them with any shoe in their catalog. Her selection is a lovely pair of riding style patent leather boots. They only cost us the price of postage to return the torn clogs.
Since I have really rattled on today, I will stop here, and save the rest for another day.
Since none of us are proficient enough musically to play for anything but practice and pleasure, right now—pray for us, we use what folks in the Cincinnati, Ohio area called “canned music”. What you never heard of canned music?
Anyone ever see a can of “Florida Sunshine”? They were quite popular souvenirs, at least in the early to mid 1970’s. (Dating myself now, right?) They usually had a pretty label showing an orange, or orange tree, a sunshine face, or the mascot “Orange Bird”. http://ts3.images.live.com/images/thumbnail.aspx?q=198101837306&id=d90d3a9159a3c8637f23a6ac2bcda10e
Obviously they were nothing more than an empty can with a label.
That’s what I thought canned music was--something like that, but not like it at all.
Turns out that canned music is music used for singing that is taped, not live music. It was unpopular, ok, hated, by almost every church we set foot in. People far and wide would say “we don’t want no canned music in our church”.
Dave M. and Mrs. P and Mrs. M , often sang using cued music on tape which they purchased from the local Christisan bookstore in MD. None of them, the tapes, were offensive. The music was orchestra-like, not band music. These were probably predecessors to contemporary music as we know it today.
As time marches on, the world has infiltrated the church. Instead of being “in the world, not of the world”, we just modify, or “Christianize” things of the world, so we can indulge the flesh, remain popular, not sacrifice, not old fashioned, and be inoffensive to the world.
There is a poem or tract about the church dancing with the world. Its very true, and that’s sad to me.
Thus the musical tracks that Christian singers used to use, are far removed from those today. The background music drowns out the singers voice. Instead of hearing the words, and letting them minister to the spirit, the music overpowers the spirit and feeds the flesh.
Which leaves churches with little or no musical talent in their congregation little choice, and they are forced to chose between using worldly, fleshly music, or off key-wrong note-no music. People look forward to music in church. It sets the mood for the service. Could this by the reason why more contemporary churches use contemporary music or praise and worship music, but the depth of preaching and teaching which delves into the Word of God is missing?
Since we move in the old fashioned, traditional, KJV Baptist circles, the churches we visited were struggling to survive and remain true to their values, convictions and the Holy Spirit.
That’s why they hate canned music.
In Ohio, there is a dear older couple who adopted us when we first relocated to Harrison. Bob and Bro. H. disagree on issues, and they sharpen iron together, but at the end of each conversation, there is still love, friendship and respect. Bro. H. is one of the folks who hates canned music.
Bob’s been working on digitizing all our music tapes for almost 2 weeks. Our tape collection began 32 years ago when Bob got saved. There are music tapes and sermons, Bible studies, and revival music. It is much harder than it seems like it should be. Bob must play each tape at normal speed, and had been pumped full of Godly music daily. Much of the music we own can never be replaced. Voices change over time. People die or stray from the LORD. He feels like it is his duty to preserve this legacy for us, our children, our grandchildren, and anyone else with whom we might share it.
Well, while he is taping, and needs to catch a break, he will make phone calls. He decided to call up Bro. H. During their conversation, Bob explained to him that we use our music tapes for church every week. We have 2 sets of tapes that are just piano playing hymns so we can sing hymns with music. The first thing Bro. H said was, “I hate that ole canned music!” Bob, ever the hopeful man that he is, wanted to see if he could show him that “not all canned music is alike” (I just heard the Hebrew National Hot Dog voice saying “We answer to and even higher authority”)
Bob pulled up Abigail Miller’s file, and played a song for him. He like it. So Bob put another good one on, and he liked that. The piece’ de resistance’ was Dave Arnold. Now that tape is from 1981-1982. Bro. Arnold was a friend of our pastor, and preached at our revival. Bro. Arnold also sings, well he did then. He is a good Bro. and terrific preacher. When he set up his table with his tapes, I wanted one badly but didn’t have the money. He let me take a tape and I promised to pay for it late. (Which I did.) Several years later he made another tape. Evangelist Dave Arnold has always, and will always be near and dear to my heart because of his trusting me with his tape. He was the first person I ever heard sing “Rejoice in the LORD” and I fell in love with that song, right then. It is still one of my favorite songs. Bro. H. liked it too. Bob may have converted him to being pro-old-fashioned, Godly canned music when you haven’t got any musicians.
We are going to try to figure out how to share our treasure trove of music. When we do I’ll let you know how, when, and where.
David has been calling us a lot more frequently, and in the weeks since his birthday things have been changing between him and Bob. It’s wonderful. A few of the phone calls, I just wanted to run around the yard jumping and shouting praises to God. The other night was especially dear, because I had decided to use my favorite photo of David and I for my profile picture on facebook. He was 2-3 months old when it was taken. I’d barely uploaded it when he phoned, and we had such sweet fellowship, and my David, the real one, was back. His heart is back in the place it should be. It’s hard to believe it has been just 9 months since the day we thought he was completely ruining his life, but God didn’t allow it, and rerouted him.
For so long he was here but his heart was estranged from us. Now he is away from us but his heart is ever so close-he is home in the truest sense of the word.
Instead of not wanting to talk to us, we have been on the phone for hours, chatting about nothing in particular. But other calls are of a serious nature and he has opened up to us in a way we had only dreamed about. Especially with Bob. Bob and David were inseparable for, oh.. wow… forever…until we allowed David to work for another man we knew. From then on, Bob was 2nd best. David’s heart was stolen. He was 12 or 13 at the time. It grew worse, and David began to resent his Daddy-his Daddy who up to then was everything to him. Bob didn’t see it right away, but I did, and it hurt.
The contrast is dramatic, like light v. darkness. An open heart after being so tightly closed, it is as if he is bursting at the seams to let all the bottled up good stuff burst out.
Lately he has been seeing Daddy in a whole new light; the light he should have been in all along. But better late than never. In face, he has really begun to look up to him, rather like he did as a little laddie. It is very sweet and endearing. The strain between them was hard on me, but I didn’t realize how hard until the weight has lifted. My cup is overflowing and I’m drinking from the saucer!!!
With being 21 now, he is really praying hard for a wife. He wants the woman God has for him, and desires with all his heart to go about things the right way. Please pray from him in this, and that if God doesn’t bring his spouse along anytime soon, that David will be patient and trust the LORD.
Well, it looks like all I have done is talk 2 of the important men in my life, hehehehehehe What a blessing to talk of them with joyfulness instead of sorrow, or worry.
This week we are planning our holiday get-away, and baking, projects. David may be home the week of the 25th so we can have some time here before we head to MD to be with my sister(s) and parents.
Over Thanksgiving, it was strange David being away-his first away from home. My sister, April, didn’t come either, but we got together Fri. and talked some things out. Charlene was missed. My parents were here, and that always makes it feel like Thanksgiving bcz we’ve done it for years.
School has been hard this week. Every day has been chaotic and we seem to struggle with getting to it. Plus, all 3 are struggling with their math right now. It will be nice to have only one struggle at a time, instead of them lining up for help. BUT I wouldn’t have it any other way, even when I feel it is making me totally insane.
Charity was hired to sew up a few jumpers. She is happy about that. She also was blessed because she got a pair of expensive clogs that tore right away, and the company replaced them with any shoe in their catalog. Her selection is a lovely pair of riding style patent leather boots. They only cost us the price of postage to return the torn clogs.
Since I have really rattled on today, I will stop here, and save the rest for another day.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Friday, September 26, 2008
Friday, September 19, 2008
Today I wanna quit
The past bunch of weeks have been hard. All of us have been sick, and my son had to have surgery too. Illness has clung to us like a tick on a dog. Our normal routines, which are almost too flexible anyway, have been totally erradicated. I wanna quit!!!!
My children....constant fighting, snapping, biting, chewing,--not literally, but with their mouths, attitudes and tongues, I am just at the end of my rope and hanging on by the tip of a thread.
My oldest daughter, who is 19, wants to give orders, but when disobeyed, argues with them instead of writing them up. ugh
Pray for us.
My children....constant fighting, snapping, biting, chewing,--not literally, but with their mouths, attitudes and tongues, I am just at the end of my rope and hanging on by the tip of a thread.
My oldest daughter, who is 19, wants to give orders, but when disobeyed, argues with them instead of writing them up. ugh
Pray for us.
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Foggy Brain and Pulling the Plug
This season of sickness from which we are emerging feels much longer than it really is. It has definately given me a greater appreciation for our overall health and wellness. Praise the LORD that it is temporary, and that we will one day leave this behind, and even the worst pain and suffering will be forgotten.
Bro. Bob had a birthday on Sat. We baked him a cake. He was very touched to get a new Bible and Charity made a cover for it. I'll work on loading some of them later. I am a bit rusty at all this, and now that we are moving back into a normal routine, there is so much hanging over my head that I almost don't know where to begin. Guess I will need to make some lists and prioritize tasks.
My brain has felt foggy the last month or so. Email and basically even a conversation has beeen hard. For the first time in several years I have gotten online only to sit and play games. Then I start to feel guilty about NOT feeling guilty. Isn't it amazing how the enemy wants to control us with guilt? Bro. Knox preached a sermon when we were up in NY, and I forget which one it went with, but he reminded everyone that though our souls are saved, our mind is not. That is why Paul talked about "renewing our minds" that is why we must immerse ourselves in the word of God. The only difference between a Christian who is living for God and one who is living for self, is God's grace, and staying in the word. Keeping our hearts clean. Renewing our minds daily. How shall a young man cleanse his way? by taking heed there to according to thy word.
In the past few weeks of quarantine by our own volition, I've thought alot about my dilemna with my friend--the phone call from a previous post--and I realize a few things. The reason I am going to share this with you is to help those who might read this, should they be enveloped in a similar situation. Some of what I am going to tell you I have not yet done, yet. But I hope to be able to soon.
Eph 5:11
And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove [them].
Confession time: don't hate me, ok? While we've been sick we've watched a good bit of TV. In fact, we never watch so much of it except when we are sick. It is discouraging really--you finally can't do much but sit and stare, or "veg-out" and there is nothing suitable to see. Anyhow...I am getting a little ahead of myself.
Reverse.... Since that fateful phone call, I have done MUCH thinking about it. The rest of this post is a conglomeration of my conclusions, and response(s) to my friend.
First, my beloved friend, is not living her life for the LORD JESUS. Her goals and desires are not well pleasing to Him. In fact, I hate to admit it, but some of the things she enjoys are completely opposite of godly. And I mean that in the fullest sense of the words. There were some sports she was into for years. Yes, it bothered me--the beer ads, liquor company sponsors, and the numerous commercials for mens products, and worst of all , this all was on Sunday--is it any wonder these folks in the sports world don't see a difference in our lives and have no desire for Christ? Ok..sorry...coming back now... ALL that I could "live with" and just shook my head to myself. The history between us is not the greatest. There were many years of silence between us, because of childhood wrongs done to her. Each encounter I am reminded and blamed for everything wrong in her life. alright..sorry..I guess I have just held this all in so long it is spilling over and making little sense to any of you... don't feel bad, I can't make alot of sense out of it either. Anyway, the history lesson had to be given so you see where this is all coming from... alot unforgiveness, bitterness, anger, that has freely grown over the years, and held onto like a trophy.
So, what am I to do? About 6 maybe 7 years ago, there was a huge turn about between us. She was going to church, growing, saying all the things a christian who wants to please God says.... The old contentions between us seemed like they were forever behind us, and we became BESTEST FRIENDS up until 2006. I though BFF.
I'm not sure WHY, but in a few short months we went from to . To this day she has never told me what I did or didn't do. And from there, 2006 to the present, it's been a downward spiral. Nothing I say or do amends the problem. Honestly, I am not strong enough, or weary enough, yet, to pray, whatever it takes LORD. The possibilities of WHAT it would take, and the SEVERITY of that, is a bit overwhelming at this point.
My foggy brain... sorry.... This is heavy on my heart and mind. It isnt' everyday you lose your BFF, ya know???? Guess what I realized? The unravelling of our BFF-ness... I refused to see it, I clung to it, and wouldn't let go. That is why it is unravelled instead of just a clean break. (Many marriages are like that, but that is another topic for another day) It seems to me, now that I have stepped back a bit from it, that I tried to keep a friendship alive that was already dead. Our friendship was on life-support--and I am/was the one with the choice of pulling the plug, and I didnt'. I kept hoping if I did this, or tried that, or said this, or just didn't say anything...... it would help. I've watched in silence as she destroys her own life, but refuses to accept any responsibility for her actions. In fact, she sees nothing wrong with her actions, and when she does she excuses herself somehow. For example, were any of us who know her, to be cranky or extra sensitive one time, and snap at her, she'd be highly offended, no matter what the reason, BUT she snaps, and bites, and tears, and rips at the people who care about her, who put up with her, who love her, and denies she hurt them, or makes an excuse for it-hungry, tired.... and we are all to just take it. And we have, to keep peace. well, it hasn't worked. Remember I am just putting all the pieces of this scenario together even though it's been in the works for decades, literally!!
She commented to me that I always think I am right. Naturally I protested. LOL But in retrospect, understanding her rationale, I can see how she feels that way, even though I thought I was just trying to be a good friend and help. Unfortunately, you can't force someone to accept your help. And when they too have been well taught what the Bible has to say about sin, and they disobey God's word, and they know you are trying NOT to disobey,...it just doesn't sit too well . That is why she accused me of thinking I am always right. In that sense, she is correct.
Regardless of my calling or not calling enough, what we had 3+ yrs ago has died. God can revive it, but He won't force that. And neither should I. That is what I have tried to do all this time. She may very well had justifiable reasons to be upset with me, but the diffference in where we are at in our walk with the LORD, is why we are at the point of no fellowship. (and I say that with all humility, because I KNOW KNOW KNOW that it is ALL GODS GRACE that I am here and not out in the world, living for the flesh, and the devil) Its really hard to know when to let go sometimes. But I am letting go of the friendship that was and is no more, and if God so wills to grant us a new lease on that friendship, I'll take it, but for now I have to step aside and stand for righteousness and holiness.
I do not know the state of her mind and heart as God does. From what I hear, see and know, it will be a long road to recovery. I don't know all of what she has involved herself in, but some of what I've seen is rebellious and evil and wicked, and it feeds that side of human nature. (It would feed my flesh, selfish side if I got into too).
Part of me wants to tell her that the real issue isn't between us, it's between her and God. I don't like not having peace about her salvation. She stated that when she was really bad, 10yrs ago, she still felt guilty so she knew she was saved because of that. However, except for the few yrs she was going to church, if the fruit in her life is evidence of anything at all, it says loudly that her salvation is questionable at best. She grew up in church, hearing what was right/wrong. It is natural that she'd feel guilty, but not evidence of being saved, right?
One thing is certain, I will always love her, and I will never purposely be unkind, or try to hurt her, even though in my flesh I want to reallly give her a piece of my mind, for this present time until whenever, for the sake of my children and I, we MUST take steps away her. This is to keep us sane, prevent future fights, and in accordance with Scripture
Eph 5:11
And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove [them].
I' know that many of you might have already faced a situation such as this with you family, friends or neightbors. And like anyone who has had to do this, it isn't easy to do. My heart is very open to restoring her, ASAP, but she has to want that. Right now, that seems highly unlikely. However God's ways are not ours,and just when we think all is lost, Jesus comes walking on the water and works a miracle.
Please pray for all of us, and the God will be glorified through it all
Bro. Bob had a birthday on Sat. We baked him a cake. He was very touched to get a new Bible and Charity made a cover for it. I'll work on loading some of them later. I am a bit rusty at all this, and now that we are moving back into a normal routine, there is so much hanging over my head that I almost don't know where to begin. Guess I will need to make some lists and prioritize tasks.
My brain has felt foggy the last month or so. Email and basically even a conversation has beeen hard. For the first time in several years I have gotten online only to sit and play games. Then I start to feel guilty about NOT feeling guilty. Isn't it amazing how the enemy wants to control us with guilt? Bro. Knox preached a sermon when we were up in NY, and I forget which one it went with, but he reminded everyone that though our souls are saved, our mind is not. That is why Paul talked about "renewing our minds" that is why we must immerse ourselves in the word of God. The only difference between a Christian who is living for God and one who is living for self, is God's grace, and staying in the word. Keeping our hearts clean. Renewing our minds daily. How shall a young man cleanse his way? by taking heed there to according to thy word.
In the past few weeks of quarantine by our own volition, I've thought alot about my dilemna with my friend--the phone call from a previous post--and I realize a few things. The reason I am going to share this with you is to help those who might read this, should they be enveloped in a similar situation. Some of what I am going to tell you I have not yet done, yet. But I hope to be able to soon.
Eph 5:11
And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove [them].
Confession time: don't hate me, ok? While we've been sick we've watched a good bit of TV. In fact, we never watch so much of it except when we are sick. It is discouraging really--you finally can't do much but sit and stare, or "veg-out" and there is nothing suitable to see. Anyhow...I am getting a little ahead of myself.
Reverse.... Since that fateful phone call, I have done MUCH thinking about it. The rest of this post is a conglomeration of my conclusions, and response(s) to my friend.
First, my beloved friend, is not living her life for the LORD JESUS. Her goals and desires are not well pleasing to Him. In fact, I hate to admit it, but some of the things she enjoys are completely opposite of godly. And I mean that in the fullest sense of the words. There were some sports she was into for years. Yes, it bothered me--the beer ads, liquor company sponsors, and the numerous commercials for mens products, and worst of all , this all was on Sunday--is it any wonder these folks in the sports world don't see a difference in our lives and have no desire for Christ? Ok..sorry...coming back now... ALL that I could "live with" and just shook my head to myself. The history between us is not the greatest. There were many years of silence between us, because of childhood wrongs done to her. Each encounter I am reminded and blamed for everything wrong in her life. alright..sorry..I guess I have just held this all in so long it is spilling over and making little sense to any of you... don't feel bad, I can't make alot of sense out of it either. Anyway, the history lesson had to be given so you see where this is all coming from... alot unforgiveness, bitterness, anger, that has freely grown over the years, and held onto like a trophy.
So, what am I to do? About 6 maybe 7 years ago, there was a huge turn about between us. She was going to church, growing, saying all the things a christian who wants to please God says.... The old contentions between us seemed like they were forever behind us, and we became BESTEST FRIENDS up until 2006. I though BFF.
I'm not sure WHY, but in a few short months we went from to . To this day she has never told me what I did or didn't do. And from there, 2006 to the present, it's been a downward spiral. Nothing I say or do amends the problem. Honestly, I am not strong enough, or weary enough, yet, to pray, whatever it takes LORD. The possibilities of WHAT it would take, and the SEVERITY of that, is a bit overwhelming at this point.
My foggy brain... sorry.... This is heavy on my heart and mind. It isnt' everyday you lose your BFF, ya know???? Guess what I realized? The unravelling of our BFF-ness... I refused to see it, I clung to it, and wouldn't let go. That is why it is unravelled instead of just a clean break. (Many marriages are like that, but that is another topic for another day) It seems to me, now that I have stepped back a bit from it, that I tried to keep a friendship alive that was already dead. Our friendship was on life-support--and I am/was the one with the choice of pulling the plug, and I didnt'. I kept hoping if I did this, or tried that, or said this, or just didn't say anything...... it would help. I've watched in silence as she destroys her own life, but refuses to accept any responsibility for her actions. In fact, she sees nothing wrong with her actions, and when she does she excuses herself somehow. For example, were any of us who know her, to be cranky or extra sensitive one time, and snap at her, she'd be highly offended, no matter what the reason, BUT she snaps, and bites, and tears, and rips at the people who care about her, who put up with her, who love her, and denies she hurt them, or makes an excuse for it-hungry, tired.... and we are all to just take it. And we have, to keep peace.
She commented to me that I always think I am right. Naturally I protested. LOL But in retrospect, understanding her rationale, I can see how she feels that way, even though I thought I was just trying to be a good friend and help. Unfortunately, you can't force someone to accept your help. And when they too have been well taught what the Bible has to say about sin, and they disobey God's word, and they know you are trying NOT to disobey,...it just doesn't sit too well . That is why she accused me of thinking I am always right. In that sense, she is correct.
Regardless of my calling or not calling enough, what we had 3+ yrs ago has died. God can revive it, but He won't force that. And neither should I. That is what I have tried to do all this time. She may very well had justifiable reasons to be upset with me, but the diffference in where we are at in our walk with the LORD, is why we are at the point of no fellowship. (and I say that with all humility, because I KNOW KNOW KNOW that it is ALL GODS GRACE that I am here and not out in the world, living for the flesh, and the devil) Its really hard to know when to let go sometimes. But I am letting go of the friendship that was and is no more, and if God so wills to grant us a new lease on that friendship, I'll take it, but for now I have to step aside and stand for righteousness and holiness.
I do not know the state of her mind and heart as God does. From what I hear, see and know, it will be a long road to recovery. I don't know all of what she has involved herself in, but some of what I've seen is rebellious and evil and wicked, and it feeds that side of human nature. (It would feed my flesh, selfish side if I got into too).
Part of me wants to tell her that the real issue isn't between us, it's between her and God. I don't like not having peace about her salvation. She stated that when she was really bad, 10yrs ago, she still felt guilty so she knew she was saved because of that. However, except for the few yrs she was going to church, if the fruit in her life is evidence of anything at all, it says loudly that her salvation is questionable at best. She grew up in church, hearing what was right/wrong. It is natural that she'd feel guilty, but not evidence of being saved, right?
One thing is certain, I will always love her, and I will never purposely be unkind, or try to hurt her, even though in my flesh I want to reallly give her a piece of my mind, for this present time until whenever, for the sake of my children and I, we MUST take steps away her. This is to keep us sane, prevent future fights, and in accordance with Scripture
Eph 5:11
And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove [them].
I' know that many of you might have already faced a situation such as this with you family, friends or neightbors. And like anyone who has had to do this, it isn't easy to do. My heart is very open to restoring her, ASAP, but she has to want that. Right now, that seems highly unlikely. However God's ways are not ours,and just when we think all is lost, Jesus comes walking on the water and works a miracle.
Please pray for all of us, and the God will be glorified through it all
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
Sickness, Surgery, Storms
With us all being so sick, including Bob, we have had to cancel church for the past 3 weeks. That alone throws life off, add to that the fact that we have all felt like doing nothing but sit and stare into space, or sleep,…you get the idea.
BESIDES all of us being sick/getting well, dear Joshua had a gall bladder attack. His gall bladder was functioning at 24%. The ER doctor told him it had to go, but we needed to get a referral from his primary physician (PCP). The PCP made an appointment for Monday (which would have been yesterday). Since we had to go to the hospital for me to have my labwork down, and the surgeons office was right across the street, Bob and Joshua went to the surgeons office while I had my blood drawn. When they met me back at the hospital waiting room, they were on their way back to the ER bcz the surgeon wanted to see Josh up there. There was some confusion and mixed messages about this but the surgeon arrived much sooner than I thought he would. He looked over the previous lab results, ultrasound, etc; then he ran through some of the common symptoms of gall bladder trouble (Joshua had them all for a LONG time); then he drew some pictures of what he planned to do, and assured us that if there was only blockage he’d clear that and leave the gall bladder in place. The Dr. admitted him right then, Thurs. afternoon, and he would have surgery on Fri. morning.
Surgery went well, but Joshua felt a lot worse than he thought he would. He told us when they took him to the OR he had to tell them not to start bcz he wasn’t out yet. LOL They allowed him to stay at the hospital until Sunday afternoon. The surgeon told him Sun. that he is surprised the ER Dr. let him go home bcz Joshua’s gall bladder was so enlarged from all the backed up bile, that it’s a miracle it didn’t burst. Praise the LORD for His protection.
Joshua is home and on the mend. He has the usual pain, but is glad it’s over with.
Anyway, as many of you know, since last Sept. or Oct. our family has been through a lot. Many storms have come our way, and you start to wonder if you will survive it all.
On Sunday we listened to this sermon, and it was such a blessing and encouragement that I thought I would share the outline and link with all of you. Maybe you are weathering a storm right now. Just remember Jesus cares and knows all about it. You might feel forgotten by your friends, and loved one, but He is there, guiding, protecting and ensuring that you don’t drown when the waves go over you head.
A storm that seems small to you, may be huge to someone else. When you’ve gone through a hurricane or tornado or survived a blizzard a heavy rain or snow might seem small to you, but to one who has only seen a shower or flurries here and there, even a little have rain or few inches of snow might be all it takes to rock their world. Keeping that thought in mind helps me to have compassion on others when they cry or even whine about something that seems small to me, because from where they are seated it’s BIG.
This sermon was really perfect for me. It blessed me so much.
How to Find Peace in the Midst of Your Storm
John 6:16-21
(Program 2158, Airing on 08.31.08)
I. I AM GOVERNED BY HIS PROVIDENCE
A. Matthew 14:22
B. Psalm 107:24
II. I AM GROWING BY HIS PLAN
A. Psalm 4:1
B. There are two types of storms
i. Correcting storms – when we’re outside the will of God
ii. Perfecting storms – when we’re inside the will of God; God uses the storm to grow us
III. I AM GRACED BY HIS PRAYERS
A. The finished work of Jesus is Calvary; the unfinished work of Jesus is His prayer ministry
B. John 6:17
C. Matthew 14:23
D. Mark 6:47-48
E. Hebrews 7:25
IV. I AM GLADDENED BY HIS PRESENCE
A. John 6:20
B. Matthew 14:27
C. John 6:12-13
D. 1 Thessalonians 5:18
E. The Lord waited to calm the storm
i. Isaiah 30:18
ii. His wait is strategic and deliberate
1. Raising of Lazarus (John 11)
F. Habakkuk 2:3
V. I AM GUARDED BY HIS POWER
A. He is the Great I AM (John 6:20)
i. Proclamation of His presence
ii. Announcement of abundance
VI. I AM GUIDED BY HIS PURPOSE
A. John 6:21
http://www.lwf.org/site/News2?page=NewsArticle&id=8353&news_iv_ctrl=1381
BESIDES all of us being sick/getting well, dear Joshua had a gall bladder attack. His gall bladder was functioning at 24%. The ER doctor told him it had to go, but we needed to get a referral from his primary physician (PCP). The PCP made an appointment for Monday (which would have been yesterday). Since we had to go to the hospital for me to have my labwork down, and the surgeons office was right across the street, Bob and Joshua went to the surgeons office while I had my blood drawn. When they met me back at the hospital waiting room, they were on their way back to the ER bcz the surgeon wanted to see Josh up there. There was some confusion and mixed messages about this but the surgeon arrived much sooner than I thought he would. He looked over the previous lab results, ultrasound, etc; then he ran through some of the common symptoms of gall bladder trouble (Joshua had them all for a LONG time); then he drew some pictures of what he planned to do, and assured us that if there was only blockage he’d clear that and leave the gall bladder in place. The Dr. admitted him right then, Thurs. afternoon, and he would have surgery on Fri. morning.
Surgery went well, but Joshua felt a lot worse than he thought he would. He told us when they took him to the OR he had to tell them not to start bcz he wasn’t out yet. LOL They allowed him to stay at the hospital until Sunday afternoon. The surgeon told him Sun. that he is surprised the ER Dr. let him go home bcz Joshua’s gall bladder was so enlarged from all the backed up bile, that it’s a miracle it didn’t burst. Praise the LORD for His protection.
Joshua is home and on the mend. He has the usual pain, but is glad it’s over with.
Anyway, as many of you know, since last Sept. or Oct. our family has been through a lot. Many storms have come our way, and you start to wonder if you will survive it all.
On Sunday we listened to this sermon, and it was such a blessing and encouragement that I thought I would share the outline and link with all of you. Maybe you are weathering a storm right now. Just remember Jesus cares and knows all about it. You might feel forgotten by your friends, and loved one, but He is there, guiding, protecting and ensuring that you don’t drown when the waves go over you head.
A storm that seems small to you, may be huge to someone else. When you’ve gone through a hurricane or tornado or survived a blizzard a heavy rain or snow might seem small to you, but to one who has only seen a shower or flurries here and there, even a little have rain or few inches of snow might be all it takes to rock their world. Keeping that thought in mind helps me to have compassion on others when they cry or even whine about something that seems small to me, because from where they are seated it’s BIG.
This sermon was really perfect for me. It blessed me so much.
How to Find Peace in the Midst of Your Storm
John 6:16-21
(Program 2158, Airing on 08.31.08)
I. I AM GOVERNED BY HIS PROVIDENCE
A. Matthew 14:22
B. Psalm 107:24
II. I AM GROWING BY HIS PLAN
A. Psalm 4:1
B. There are two types of storms
i. Correcting storms – when we’re outside the will of God
ii. Perfecting storms – when we’re inside the will of God; God uses the storm to grow us
III. I AM GRACED BY HIS PRAYERS
A. The finished work of Jesus is Calvary; the unfinished work of Jesus is His prayer ministry
B. John 6:17
C. Matthew 14:23
D. Mark 6:47-48
E. Hebrews 7:25
IV. I AM GLADDENED BY HIS PRESENCE
A. John 6:20
B. Matthew 14:27
C. John 6:12-13
D. 1 Thessalonians 5:18
E. The Lord waited to calm the storm
i. Isaiah 30:18
ii. His wait is strategic and deliberate
1. Raising of Lazarus (John 11)
F. Habakkuk 2:3
V. I AM GUARDED BY HIS POWER
A. He is the Great I AM (John 6:20)
i. Proclamation of His presence
ii. Announcement of abundance
VI. I AM GUIDED BY HIS PURPOSE
A. John 6:21
http://www.lwf.org/site/News2?page=NewsArticle&id=8353&news_iv_ctrl=1381
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
Shuffle off to Buffalo
This is my last post until we get back on Monday. It's been a busy, crazy day...a real mixture of excited anticipation and S_T_R_E_S_S STREEEESSSSSSSSSSS..... But we are all anxious, in a good way, to see what the LORD has in store for us at the meetings. Every turn of the clock brings with it fresh provision for our needs to get us there and home again. It is really neat to see God work when you go by faith, or plan to do so. The dear Bro. who is coming to our church, he's 73, and can't walk very well, but is able to care for himself. He wanted to go with us too. And we wanted to take him along. The catch was finding a place for him to stay. We pulled out the video of the first Blitz in 2003, which this is not a true blitz, but a memorial for Bro. Hance whose heart was street ministry/preaching.
Watching the video was bittersweet. There are many faces we do not see anymore bcz the world, the flesh and the devil have pulled them away from serving Our Blessed Saviour. On the other hand, there are faces we can't see this trip because these dear saints of God are off in distant lands preaching the gospel to the people there. That is bitter-sweet. Oh my, seeing my children, they were so small, and zealous, and comical. Joshua is so small, and his Bible looked huge under his little arm. And he looked adorable in his dress clothes complete with suspenders. He was so happy to be holding a scripture sign for Jesus. David too was small, holding up a banner the same height as he was, and having his bible tucked in the back waistband of his pants--he thought that was the greatest thing EVER! So many memories!!! It was at that blitz that Josh was called to preach. At one blitz Joy got saved. Charity was saved at the next one. And David got saved, or is sure he got saved, the week after we came home. Obviously, these trips are not about having a vacation, though for us, the getting away, the fellowship, the camaraderie around dear brothers and sisters in Christ who serve the LORD with gladness and love Him so much makes it FEEL LIKE a vacation. It is such a season of refreshing. Any of you who have the means and the time to make the trip should come and see for yourselves. Each year somehow changed our lives for the glory of the LORD. And that is what we need, we need to be conformed to the image of Christ more and more, and have a heart that is glad the HE CAN USE US. Instead of thinking to ourselves that he is lucky to have us; or we are nor worthy, or not able to serve Him. In our flesh and our own strength we cannot serve or bring glory to Him, but the BLessed Holy Spirit enables us to do things which humanly seem impossible.
For example, I have learned to play the piano. This desire has been in my heart for a long time, but it was after that first blitz that God showed me HE can teach me (though the words of a dear bro.) bcz HE created music. Though I do not play very well, and have MUCH MORE to learn, Jesus is teaching me to play. And I LOVE IT! I can lose myself at the piano, playing for hours and hours, if I didn't have my family to take care of. It is my sure belief that the reason why God has used these meetings, the sermons, etc, to change and mould our lives for the better for His use, is because we want that. We WANT Him to use us. We WANT to be busy DOING HIS WILL. That's not to say we don't have moments that we doubt, or wonder what His will even is...but HIS will is on our hearts and minds, to find it, or try to do it. Yes, we fail, miserably. But that is when He is all the more gracious, loving and kind. He doesn't tell us to get away, or push us off, but pulls us close to His loving breast, dresses our wounds, dries our tears and pats us on the back with a "there, there my child" and we can go on BECAUSE OF HIM. That's why we are where we are, why we do what we do, why we ANTICIPATE with JOY what HE has in store for us this weekend. PRAY for us, Please!!!!
David and I talked on the phone for more than TWO hours last night!!! God is so good. What a blessing! What a miracle. Our chat was a little bit of goofiness,you know the kind that you get into on the phone, but it was more about life and the things God is showing him, and leading him. He just oozes JOY in Jesus LETTING him serve Him. That was his exact words. My heart is overflowing with joy! I put together some school supplies to encourage him as he starts Bible School in a couple weeks. When your son tells you he is reading his Bible and praying, and sharing with you how the Holy Spirit speaks to him about this or that, and brings scripture to his mind; when he called here about 2 weeks ago to tell us he'd led a 13 yr. boy to the LORD when they were out street preaching in Buffalo--let me tell you he was EXCITED!!!! Bouncing off the walls excited. PRAISE GOD!!!!!!!
Alrighty, I know I wanted to gab a bit more about other things but we are leaving around 4am, and I have a few things to do before I hit the hay....so I will send this off to you. Please keep us all in your prayers. We need all we can get.
Love,
Terry at Home in Pa www.boazbaptist.com/www.freewebs.com/joyfulhelpmeetathome/http://joyfulhelpmeetathome.blogspot.com/http://geocities.com/joyfulhelpmeetathome/http://www.blujay.com/1914wife/
Watching the video was bittersweet. There are many faces we do not see anymore bcz the world, the flesh and the devil have pulled them away from serving Our Blessed Saviour. On the other hand, there are faces we can't see this trip because these dear saints of God are off in distant lands preaching the gospel to the people there. That is bitter-sweet. Oh my, seeing my children, they were so small, and zealous, and comical. Joshua is so small, and his Bible looked huge under his little arm. And he looked adorable in his dress clothes complete with suspenders. He was so happy to be holding a scripture sign for Jesus. David too was small, holding up a banner the same height as he was, and having his bible tucked in the back waistband of his pants--he thought that was the greatest thing EVER! So many memories!!! It was at that blitz that Josh was called to preach. At one blitz Joy got saved. Charity was saved at the next one. And David got saved, or is sure he got saved, the week after we came home. Obviously, these trips are not about having a vacation, though for us, the getting away, the fellowship, the camaraderie around dear brothers and sisters in Christ who serve the LORD with gladness and love Him so much makes it FEEL LIKE a vacation. It is such a season of refreshing. Any of you who have the means and the time to make the trip should come and see for yourselves. Each year somehow changed our lives for the glory of the LORD. And that is what we need, we need to be conformed to the image of Christ more and more, and have a heart that is glad the HE CAN USE US. Instead of thinking to ourselves that he is lucky to have us; or we are nor worthy, or not able to serve Him. In our flesh and our own strength we cannot serve or bring glory to Him, but the BLessed Holy Spirit enables us to do things which humanly seem impossible.
For example, I have learned to play the piano. This desire has been in my heart for a long time, but it was after that first blitz that God showed me HE can teach me (though the words of a dear bro.) bcz HE created music. Though I do not play very well, and have MUCH MORE to learn, Jesus is teaching me to play. And I LOVE IT! I can lose myself at the piano, playing for hours and hours, if I didn't have my family to take care of. It is my sure belief that the reason why God has used these meetings, the sermons, etc, to change and mould our lives for the better for His use, is because we want that. We WANT Him to use us. We WANT to be busy DOING HIS WILL. That's not to say we don't have moments that we doubt, or wonder what His will even is...but HIS will is on our hearts and minds, to find it, or try to do it. Yes, we fail, miserably. But that is when He is all the more gracious, loving and kind. He doesn't tell us to get away, or push us off, but pulls us close to His loving breast, dresses our wounds, dries our tears and pats us on the back with a "there, there my child" and we can go on BECAUSE OF HIM. That's why we are where we are, why we do what we do, why we ANTICIPATE with JOY what HE has in store for us this weekend. PRAY for us, Please!!!!
David and I talked on the phone for more than TWO hours last night!!! God is so good. What a blessing! What a miracle. Our chat was a little bit of goofiness,you know the kind that you get into on the phone, but it was more about life and the things God is showing him, and leading him. He just oozes JOY in Jesus LETTING him serve Him. That was his exact words. My heart is overflowing with joy! I put together some school supplies to encourage him as he starts Bible School in a couple weeks. When your son tells you he is reading his Bible and praying, and sharing with you how the Holy Spirit speaks to him about this or that, and brings scripture to his mind; when he called here about 2 weeks ago to tell us he'd led a 13 yr. boy to the LORD when they were out street preaching in Buffalo--let me tell you he was EXCITED!!!! Bouncing off the walls excited. PRAISE GOD!!!!!!!
Alrighty, I know I wanted to gab a bit more about other things but we are leaving around 4am, and I have a few things to do before I hit the hay....so I will send this off to you. Please keep us all in your prayers. We need all we can get.
Love,
Terry at Home in Pa www.boazbaptist.com/www.freewebs.com/joyfulhelpmeetathome/http://joyfulhelpmeetathome.blogspot.com/http://geocities.com/joyfulhelpmeetathome/http://www.blujay.com/1914wife/
Friday, August 8, 2008
Sunday, August 3, 2008
Why I was out of touch and MIA
Dear Friends,
Please forgive my sending yet another "mass mail" update on things here on the homefront. It goes against my personal feelings about writing letters to those I care about, and who, hopefully, care about me in return. I have several messages in my mailbox dating back to January! Oy! Talk about feeling ashamed...the word crumb and heel come quickly to mind. If you've emailed me and not gotten a response, it is NOT because I don't want to respond, but a real struggle with getting my priorities in order and keeping them that way.
In the months since I really wrote to anyone, so much has gone on that it is hard to know where to start. The situations that ensued pierced us all to the very core. Our marriage was on the rocks; our family was divided; our hearts were broken. There is no way to tell you how hypocritical, and alone we all felt during our time of being tried. Difficulty in life brings out the best and the worst that is in us...and let me tell you that MUCH more of the worse was showing than the best. What made things harder was knowing in our heart and soul that how we were all feeling individually was really not right. And doing right is hard when your heart isn't in it. Going through motions without the proper heart motive is empty. We went in cycles of who the enemy was, even though we really knew, and know, that the REAL enemy was satan or his cohorts. They were out to wreck our lives, ruin our pitiful testimony, drag us into the muck and mire of despondency and despair, and so they did, for a while. The expression " A house divided cannot stand" is true. During the worst of it, the LORD let us each have little break-throughs, and helped us set aside our will for the good of the family. This was NOT easy.
The whole time I really wanted to stop trying and give up. God wouldn't allow me to do that with a clear conscience. It was sooooooooooo hard. I kept looking at what was going on and trying to blame someone, and yet I knew that all the blame didn't rest on any one person, or situation. Our furnace time was a culmination of many events rolled into one, and it came at us full speed when we least expected.
This was probably the biggest battle of my life. It nearly cost us our marriage and our family.
I spent many nights in tears, praying for peace, reconciliation, and for my family to be restored, for us to be united and for unity of spirit. This was extremely important. You see, my children and I put a lot of blame for certain situations squarely on my husband's shoulders. Being older and wise, I should have known better, but when you are hurt you don't always see things clearly, let alone scripturally; thus, as other trials came along at rapid fire pace, I put the blame completely on him, thinking if only he'd done _______ if only he didn't ____________, such and such would have been avoided. Hindsight makes it easy to lay the blame on others. Honestly, as terrible as this will sound, I reached a point where I was ready to do what so many have done before, even though I do not believe in it, even though God hates it.... Only God's grace and mercy kept me from doing that. There is no human explanation. Months of fighting within and without took a huge toll on me.
Then we nearly lost our oldest son to the world, the flesh and the devil. God is merciful to us, and turned him around. In the last week alone, he has called us to share how God is working in his life. He led his first soul to the LORD. He is going to start Bible institute in few weeks. After the missions trip to Honduras, the LORD really began dealing with him, or maybe he just started to hear Him. Either way, all of us know that he is a miracle. It is MUCH harder to come back to the LORD than it is to not leave in the first place. Our son knows this, and recognizes that God has given him another chance. Our prayer is that he will surrender to God's will whatever it may be.
As an offshoot of almost losing our firstborn, it was hard not to be extra hard on the rest of our children. And we went through several months of battles with them all. Much of the trouble stemmed from the previous months of hurt, disappointments, and missing their brother.
We have had to rearrange our thinking on many levels, and order our lives in a little bit different way than before. On top of that, our twins graduated this spring, and that is beginning to sink in. Presently, 3 of our 6 children are adults. The years have gone by far to quickly.
During the seasons of trials, many things we have wanted to do had to be placed on hold. Some will never be revived.
Someone called me last week, someone I LOVE alot. This person, at one time, considered me her best friend, and vice versa. She decided to take the opportunity to chew me out for not calling her enough. She told me she was lonely, and depressed, and threatened (in her way) not to call me anymore because I didn't call her enough, or when it was my turn. Oddly enough the phone call began pleasantly and was so nice, that when it turned ugly on me, I was shocked. After she hung up, I was very upset, and hurt, and angry..yes, angry. She basically said I didn't care about her or her feelings. In fact, that is how the conversation got turned around..she wanted to tell me how she feels...and when I tried to explain my side, without accusing her of anything, .... well... we just went around and around. Over the last few yrs. she has gotten upset with me and chosen not to speak to me for months at a time, she has been angry with me repeatedly, she has hurt me more than she will ever know. .... Once I started to rethink the call, it dawned on me that she never once asked me how I felt. I tried to tell her that it was not because I didn't want to talk to her. She knows nothing about how hard things were for us. Anyway... the LORD reminded me that during the time when we were best friends, she was striving to live for th eLORD, she was going to church, and seeking God's will for her life. When she stopped going to church, the rest soon followed and that is when the strife between us began. It dawned on me when I was talking to my husband about this that the problem is about how she feels, or how I feel, or how either of us feels about one another, it is about our goals. When our goals were the same, when we both wanted to please the LORD and serve Him, the love of Christ drew us close to one another: but since it now LOOKS LIKE our goals are not the same, the fight is on. The fight is not with me. Her fight is not with me, it is with the LORD. Her heart is not pursuing God's way and will for her life. It is all about her own will, her desires, her wants....and it LOOK LIKE, God is not a very big part of it. How can you tell this to someone you love, when you know that by doing so, you will not only hurt them, but other people who care about them will be hurt as well. But, as things stand between us now, a lot of pain has already been caused. Please pray for my friend. I have no idea how to make things better between us, and it grieves me that she is pained and that her pain causes pain to those she loves and those who love her.
The reason I shared this episode (with my friend) with you is so I can tell you that I have learned that you have to give up your will, your goals, your desires, et al.... to have the joy of the LORD and His Peace. You can't be selfish and selfless at the same time, they are complete opposites.
Lest you think I have forgotten you for no real reason, I have written all this with the hope that you will be spared some of the agony we have endured for our selfishness, and self-will; and that you will keep your eyes on God and HIS will. If you stray even a little from Him, do not delay in getting things right with Him.
Sometimes what seems it will destroy you, creates something new, and better. That is what is occurring here. The LORD has used all that we've endured, even this phone call from last week, to reshape us, to remould my thinking. Godwilling, what emerges will be a cleaner, brighter, usable vessel for Him.
Please keep in touch. My thoughts have been with you, and my prayers, though I have been out of touch via email these many months. Be Faithful!
Love In Jesus, Your Friend,
Terry at Home in Pa www.freewebs.com/boazbaptist/www.freewebs.com/joyfulhelpmeetathome/http://www.joyfulhelpmeetathome.blogger.com/http://www.geocities.com/joyfulhelpmeetathome/index.html/http://www.1914wife.blujay.com/
Please forgive my sending yet another "mass mail" update on things here on the homefront. It goes against my personal feelings about writing letters to those I care about, and who, hopefully, care about me in return. I have several messages in my mailbox dating back to January! Oy! Talk about feeling ashamed...the word crumb and heel come quickly to mind. If you've emailed me and not gotten a response, it is NOT because I don't want to respond, but a real struggle with getting my priorities in order and keeping them that way.
In the months since I really wrote to anyone, so much has gone on that it is hard to know where to start. The situations that ensued pierced us all to the very core. Our marriage was on the rocks; our family was divided; our hearts were broken. There is no way to tell you how hypocritical, and alone we all felt during our time of being tried. Difficulty in life brings out the best and the worst that is in us...and let me tell you that MUCH more of the worse was showing than the best. What made things harder was knowing in our heart and soul that how we were all feeling individually was really not right. And doing right is hard when your heart isn't in it. Going through motions without the proper heart motive is empty. We went in cycles of who the enemy was, even though we really knew, and know, that the REAL enemy was satan or his cohorts. They were out to wreck our lives, ruin our pitiful testimony, drag us into the muck and mire of despondency and despair, and so they did, for a while. The expression " A house divided cannot stand" is true. During the worst of it, the LORD let us each have little break-throughs, and helped us set aside our will for the good of the family. This was NOT easy.
The whole time I really wanted to stop trying and give up. God wouldn't allow me to do that with a clear conscience. It was sooooooooooo hard. I kept looking at what was going on and trying to blame someone, and yet I knew that all the blame didn't rest on any one person, or situation. Our furnace time was a culmination of many events rolled into one, and it came at us full speed when we least expected.
This was probably the biggest battle of my life. It nearly cost us our marriage and our family.
I spent many nights in tears, praying for peace, reconciliation, and for my family to be restored, for us to be united and for unity of spirit. This was extremely important. You see, my children and I put a lot of blame for certain situations squarely on my husband's shoulders. Being older and wise, I should have known better, but when you are hurt you don't always see things clearly, let alone scripturally; thus, as other trials came along at rapid fire pace, I put the blame completely on him, thinking if only he'd done _______ if only he didn't ____________, such and such would have been avoided. Hindsight makes it easy to lay the blame on others. Honestly, as terrible as this will sound, I reached a point where I was ready to do what so many have done before, even though I do not believe in it, even though God hates it.... Only God's grace and mercy kept me from doing that. There is no human explanation. Months of fighting within and without took a huge toll on me.
Then we nearly lost our oldest son to the world, the flesh and the devil. God is merciful to us, and turned him around. In the last week alone, he has called us to share how God is working in his life. He led his first soul to the LORD. He is going to start Bible institute in few weeks. After the missions trip to Honduras, the LORD really began dealing with him, or maybe he just started to hear Him. Either way, all of us know that he is a miracle. It is MUCH harder to come back to the LORD than it is to not leave in the first place. Our son knows this, and recognizes that God has given him another chance. Our prayer is that he will surrender to God's will whatever it may be.
As an offshoot of almost losing our firstborn, it was hard not to be extra hard on the rest of our children. And we went through several months of battles with them all. Much of the trouble stemmed from the previous months of hurt, disappointments, and missing their brother.
We have had to rearrange our thinking on many levels, and order our lives in a little bit different way than before. On top of that, our twins graduated this spring, and that is beginning to sink in. Presently, 3 of our 6 children are adults. The years have gone by far to quickly.
During the seasons of trials, many things we have wanted to do had to be placed on hold. Some will never be revived.
Someone called me last week, someone I LOVE alot. This person, at one time, considered me her best friend, and vice versa. She decided to take the opportunity to chew me out for not calling her enough. She told me she was lonely, and depressed, and threatened (in her way) not to call me anymore because I didn't call her enough, or when it was my turn. Oddly enough the phone call began pleasantly and was so nice, that when it turned ugly on me, I was shocked. After she hung up, I was very upset, and hurt, and angry..yes, angry. She basically said I didn't care about her or her feelings. In fact, that is how the conversation got turned around..she wanted to tell me how she feels...and when I tried to explain my side, without accusing her of anything, .... well... we just went around and around. Over the last few yrs. she has gotten upset with me and chosen not to speak to me for months at a time, she has been angry with me repeatedly, she has hurt me more than she will ever know. .... Once I started to rethink the call, it dawned on me that she never once asked me how I felt. I tried to tell her that it was not because I didn't want to talk to her. She knows nothing about how hard things were for us. Anyway... the LORD reminded me that during the time when we were best friends, she was striving to live for th eLORD, she was going to church, and seeking God's will for her life. When she stopped going to church, the rest soon followed and that is when the strife between us began. It dawned on me when I was talking to my husband about this that the problem is about how she feels, or how I feel, or how either of us feels about one another, it is about our goals. When our goals were the same, when we both wanted to please the LORD and serve Him, the love of Christ drew us close to one another: but since it now LOOKS LIKE our goals are not the same, the fight is on. The fight is not with me. Her fight is not with me, it is with the LORD. Her heart is not pursuing God's way and will for her life. It is all about her own will, her desires, her wants....and it LOOK LIKE, God is not a very big part of it. How can you tell this to someone you love, when you know that by doing so, you will not only hurt them, but other people who care about them will be hurt as well. But, as things stand between us now, a lot of pain has already been caused. Please pray for my friend. I have no idea how to make things better between us, and it grieves me that she is pained and that her pain causes pain to those she loves and those who love her.
The reason I shared this episode (with my friend) with you is so I can tell you that I have learned that you have to give up your will, your goals, your desires, et al.... to have the joy of the LORD and His Peace. You can't be selfish and selfless at the same time, they are complete opposites.
Lest you think I have forgotten you for no real reason, I have written all this with the hope that you will be spared some of the agony we have endured for our selfishness, and self-will; and that you will keep your eyes on God and HIS will. If you stray even a little from Him, do not delay in getting things right with Him.
Sometimes what seems it will destroy you, creates something new, and better. That is what is occurring here. The LORD has used all that we've endured, even this phone call from last week, to reshape us, to remould my thinking. Godwilling, what emerges will be a cleaner, brighter, usable vessel for Him.
Please keep in touch. My thoughts have been with you, and my prayers, though I have been out of touch via email these many months. Be Faithful!
Love In Jesus, Your Friend,
Terry at Home in Pa www.freewebs.com/boazbaptist/www.freewebs.com/joyfulhelpmeetathome/http://www.joyfulhelpmeetathome.blogger.com/http://www.geocities.com/joyfulhelpmeetathome/index.html/http://www.1914wife.blujay.com/
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Pregnancy Help, Miscarriage Prevention
During two of my pregnancies, I used herbs after praying for a miracle and healing of whatever it was that was causing me to have miscarriages, and making my babies die before term--20,24,26 weeks respectively. Shortly after being sure that God was leading me to pray that way, from a broken heart and desperation, I encountered the first of many articles on herbs reputed to prevent miscarriage. Yes, you read that correctly, PREVENT miscarriage. Up to that time, to me, herbs were just "old wives tales" but after being told by all the doctors who attended me during each prenatal visit, and delivery of my lifeless babies, I was ready to give herbs a try. After all, what did I have to lose???
My first experimental herb red raspberry leaf tea, then I added false unicorn root, and wild yam. The most noticeable change, within minutes of taking the false unicorn root extract drops, came when I was bleeding heavily during my time. I didn't even like to leave the house it was so bad. BUT after taking just 8 drops on my tongue, the bleeding slowed down, cramps disappeared, and each cycle became more regular--start on time and ending right on the 5 day mark, almost at the exact hour it began.
Within 2 months of starting false unicorn, which also helps with infertility, I was pregnant. This was just under 3 months after a miscarriage at 9 wks. Naturally I was terrified history would repeat itself. However, during my recovery time, I settled with the LORD that I would have as many miscarriages or losses as He chose to allow, because I was His vessel, and it was up to Him to give or take. Truthfully, I expected, yea, I believed that I would NEVER again hold a living child of my own in my arms. I took courage in the fact that God carried me all the other times and He wouldn't let me down, ever.
I knew a little about herbs by then because it had become my newest hobby. I devoured book after book on herbs, until I was quite sure that both herbs I elected to take were safe for me and baby. Do NOT EVER take herbs or any other remedies, unless you have peace with God about using them. This is my number one warning and rule by which I live.
Once my pregnancy was confirmed, I continued taking both herbs, along with extra Vit. E and selenium, and iodine drops from the health store. At about 7 wks I ran out of the herbs and missed a few days. Amazingly, as soon as I took them again, I felt immediately much better, and stronger in my womb. The battle for me at that point became trusting the herbs vs. trusting the LORD. I carried my herb bottles with me to take them on time each day-3times a day, and 4 if I felt run down or weak, or crampy/achy in the area of my womb and/or cervix.
This was my 12th pregnancy by the way, so I am sure that my womb and cervix needed all the help they could get. However, the herbal recommendations stated to gradually wean yourself off both herbs starting around 20 weeks. Being a newbie to herbalism, I did as they said, and all was well. In fact, I remember lying in bed, 10 days overdue, wondering if they'd worked a little too well. My only problem during labor and delivery was post-delivery bleeding...I didn't hemmorage, but had very heavy bleeding and was given a RX for some medication to cause my uterus to contract. I took that for several weeks post partum.
Instead of taking the herbs right away again, I fooled around and let them slide. My old symptoms of heavy bleeding returned, but financially we were struggling so much that I didn't want to put any more burden on my husband and did without, all the while feeling like I was a martyr inside.
Around 1 yr. of using NO herbs, I was crampy and in alot of pain, so I pulled out the red raspberry leaves and began drinking the tea, but only during my cycle. When we started talking about wanting another baby, I wasn't sure if I should try using the herbs again or not. We didnt' want to play God, but my husband wanted me to start using them again, not only to get pregnant but to feel better. So we bought them and I was back to my regime. Would you believe that I got pregnant the first few weeks using them again????
This time I was a yr.+older, and heavier to start with. I used the herbs less frequently to save money. Then around 2 mos. I had 2 days of spotting. I was certain a miscarriage was on the way. I pulled out my herb books and read what to do for a threatened miscarriage. Never before had I had any hope of preventing a miscarriage, but this time I felt the LORD had given me help, if only I would use it. So I did. I began taking the false unicorn every hour, and within less than 48 hrs. all the weakness, cramping and spotting stopped. It never came back. With all my heart and soul I believe those God given herbs prevented us from losing our baby.
Because of the post-partum weakness of my womb last time, I decided this time around to use the herbs until baby was born. During the second trimester I researched herbs to assist with labor and delivery, and over the next weeks bought these to use during the last 6 wks of pregnancy. [NEVER NEVER NEVER use pennyroyal, even in a 6wk mixture-one lady I know did this and lost her baby due to placental abruption.] With this baby, I had no ultrasounds, but felt like I did when I carried my twins. When my water broke, and the attending nurses got an echo heartbeat they did a scan. No twins, just a big baby. 11# 4 oz. of baby to be exact.
The dr. expected me to have the bleeding as before, but was shocked that I had almost no bleeding immediately after, and for the next 2 days watched me closely.
I believe the reason was due to the herbs I'd taken for the whole pregnancy, along with the 6 wk. mix I'd made and taken for just 3 weeks. Baby was 3 weeks early. Imagine how big he'd of been if I went late!
The reason I am posting all this now is to give some of you hope, or at least experiment with if you are having problems with miscarriage, irregular cycles, heavy bleeding etc. The rest of this post will include some of the herbs I used and you can research them further online or at the library. PRAY about any herbs BEFORE USE. I am not a dr. and have only shared with you what worked for me. Right now my womb is closed pretty tight, but I know if God wants to reopen shop, He can do it, He will do it if it is His will. Pray for us.
Discomforts of Pregnancy
© David L. Hoffmann B.Sc. (Hons), M.N.I.M.H.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The First Trimester
Threatened Miscarriage
For many who have suffered miscarriage in the past, herbs may prove effective in preventing this from happening again, provided that the foetus is normal and general health, physical, emotional and mental, is good. No herbal remedy will block appropriate miscarriage. Most cases of miscarriage are a natural rejection of a malformed foetus. When it occurs more than once in the same woman, it may be related to a problem on her part, rather than the baby's. In this case it is especially important to build up her general health as well as that of her partner before they attempt to conceive again. To ensure fewer complications, women should take longer at least six to twelve months between pregnancies
Where chronic poor health, inadequate diet, or trauma and stress of any kind have depleted general strength, herbs can provide extra strength and vitality, especially to the womb, and so help avoid unnecessary miscarriage.
If abdominal cramping pains and bleeding occur, medical attention is needed immediately.
Specific Remedies
A number of plants have well deserved reputations in preventing miscarriage. It may be significant that two of them are now endangered species. Important plants are listed here, with the endangered ones in bold type:
Caulophyllum thalictroides (Blue cohosh)
Chamaelirium luteum (False unicorn root)
Cypripedium pubescens (Lady's Slipper)
Dioscorea villosa (Wild yam)
Viburnum opulus (Cramp Bark)
Viburnum prunifolium (Black Haw)
Other plants that have been widely used to prevent miscarriage include Rosemary, Raspberry leaves, Hawthorn, Partridge Berry, Ginseng, Motherwort, Garlic and Fenugreek.
One Possible Prescription
Viburnum prunifolium 2 parts
Cimicifuga racemosa 2 parts
Caulophyllum thalictroides 1 part 2.5 ml of tincture three times a day, building up to 5 ml. three times day
This supplies the following actions :
Uterine tonic (Viburnum prunifolium, Cimicifuga racemosa, Caulophyllum thalictroides)
Nervine relaxant (Viburnum prunifolium, Cimicifuga racemosa)
Anti-spasmodic (Viburnum prunifolium, Cimicifuga racemosa, Caulophyllum thalictroides)
Broader Context of Treatment
Plenty of foods containing vitamins E and C should be eaten. Asparagus and celery are said to be strengthening.
Nausea, Vomiting (Morning Sickness)
It is seen in about 50% of pregnancies, and tends to be worse with each successive pregnancy. In most cases it will subside at the fourth month of pregnancy. The exact cause of is not known but there are various theories associated with it. Two important ones are:
1. The rapid change of hormone levels in early pregnancy, with resultant high levels of progesterone, may be related due to a stimulation of the vomit center in the brain. Progesterone relaxes the smooth muscle throughout the body, including that found in the arteries, and this produces a drop in blood pressure, which may account for the tiredness and lethargy associated with the nausea and sickness. During the first l2-24 weeks of the pregnancy, when most women experience sickness, the hormones are mostly produced in the corpus luteum in the ovaries. After this time the emphasis changes towards production of hormones from the placenta, possibly explaining why the sickness stops at around the time of the change over, l2-l4 weeks. Sickness could also be related to low blood pressure, especially with a relative lack of blood getting to the brain on rising which is caused by high progesterone levels. Getting up slowly will help to relieve this.
2. It may also be associated with low blood sugar, which normally occurs in early pregnancy. The nausea is often relieved through raising blood sugar levels by eating small, frequent meals. This should not have a high sugar concentration as sugar in the stomach can aggravate nausea.
Specific Remedies
There are no general rules for treating morning sickness, as the causes vary from one woman to another. Treatment should aim at what is seen as the underlying cause. Anti-emetics are important as they will reduce the vomit reflex whatever the cause. Valuable anti-emetics that are safe to use in early pregnancy include:
Ballota nigra (Black Horehound)
Filipendula ulmaria (Meadowsweet)
Gentiana lutea (Gentian)
Rosemarinus officinalis (Rosemary)
Many of the herbs which aid digestion will help. The carminative, anti-spasmodic and relaxing nervines are especially important. Examples include:
Cinnamomum aromaticum (Cinnamon bark)
Dioscorea villosa (Wild Yam)
Eugenia spp. (Cloves)
Foeniculum vulgare (Fennel seeds)
Humulus lupulus (Hops)
Lavandula spp. (Lavender)
Matricaria recutita (Chamomile)
Melissa officinalis (Balm)
Mentha piperita (Peppermint)
Rubus idaeus (Raspberry leaves)
Zingiber officinale (Ginger root)
Mucilage rich demulcents such as Chondrus crispus (Iceland Moss) and Ulmus fulva (Slippery Elm) will soothe the whole of the digestive tract. They are both highly nutritious containing many minerals and trace elements and easily digested, ideal for conditions associated with weakness of the stomach.
One Possible Prescription
Zingiber officinalis
Dioscorea Villosa
Ballota nigra equal parts 2.5 ml of tincture at night and in morning building up to 5 ml. if needed
Mentha piperita
Matricaria recutita equal parts of dried herb to make an infusion
1 teaspoonful to a cup.
Broader Treatment Considerations
Eat small meals all day rather than three large meals.
Avoid certain foods or odors that bring on symptoms.
Small starch snacks such as eating crackers in bed before arising.
100-300mg of B6/day.
Maintain electrolyte balance if vomiting is severe.
Constipation
Progesterone relaxes the intestinal muscles and so reduces their power to propel the contents of the bowel towards the rectum and out of the body. As pregnancy progresses, and the weight of the baby and placenta increases, the tendency to constipation is aggravated by the pressure exerted by these on the lower bowel. When the enlarged uterus impedes the circulation to the bowel, the action of the intestinal muscles is also restricted, as it is by any tension or anxiety which a pregnant woman experiences. Intake of iron as a supplement exacerbates or can cause constipation. Eating small starchy meals consisting of refined flour also contributes to the problem.
For more details about the herbal treatment of constipation please refer to that section in the digestive system.
DO NOT USE ANTHRAQUINONE CONTAINING STIMULANT LAXATIVES.
Please consult the section on constipation. Aim for gentle therapy, utilizing the following treatment considerations:
Increase water intake to 8 glasses per day.
Increase exercise, walk 1/2 mile per day.
Increase intake of fresh fruits and some dried fruits such as prunes, raisins, figs.
Increase roughage.
Bulk laxatives such as Psyllium seeds (1 tablespoonful 3 times a day in 1/4 cup juice).
Varicosities
These may occur early in pregnancy but generally get worse as the pregnancy advances. Symptoms vary from painless cosmetically problematic regions to mild or severe pain. Sometimes there may be a varicosity in the labia majora. For more details on the herbal treatment of varicosities please refer to the section in the Cardio-Vascular chapter.
Fatigue and Somnolence
It is normal for some pregnant women to require excessive periods of rest or sleep during the first trimester. Sleep requirements can be as much as 18 hours per day. If the woman is not working or going to school and does not have young children it is advisable to sleep whenever possible. Some women become depressed at their inability continue the normal daily activity levels established before the pregnancy. Women should be counseled that this symptom usually remits totally by the fourth month of gestation. Blood studies should be checked to rule out anemia. Sometimes ingestion of protein will alleviate this symptom.
Avoid herbal stimulants, neurological of metabolic.
Anaemia
The prevention of anaemia is a most important aspect of ante-natal care. Haemoglobin, the iron and protein compound contained in red blood cells (erythrocytes), is responsible for transporting oxygen from the lungs around the body including (of course) both placenta and foetus. If haemoglobin levels in the blood fall, so the body's ability to access oxygen falls accordingly.
During pregnancy the blood volume increases at a faster rate than the erythrocytes multiply, so they are diluted by extra fluid. There is a relative drop in haemoglobin carried by the erythrocytes of about 1 gm to approximately 11 gms. Below this level anaemia is said to exist, and may be identified by lethargy, irritability and breathlessness on slight exertion. Anaemia commonly occurs in the last two months of pregnancy, when the baby takes a high proportion of the mother's iron. It helps to build up iron reserves before pregnancy starts, so that the mother meets the increased iron demands without any problems. A history of menorrhagia would also suggest iron reserves might be low.
The best approach is to increase dietary intake of iron-containing foods. These include:
liver (best only from organically produced meat, as the liver is the detoxifying organ of mammals, and may contain residues of chemicals if it was factory reared),
free range eggs,
dairy produce,
watercress,
dried apricots,
whole-wheat bread,
cocoa and carob,
cabbage,
alfalfa,
beetroot,
cherries,
currants and raisins,
brown rice,
kelp,
wheatgerm,
sunflower seeds,
parsley,
chicory,
lentils.
blackcurrants, blackberries, strawberries
spinach
Leafy herbs that can be added to salads or cooked as a vegetable and added to soups include :
Crataegus spp. Hawthorn flowers and leaves.
Rumex acetosella Sorrel
Symphytum officinale Comfrey leaves (in moderation)
Taraxacum officinale Dandelion leaves
Urtica dioica Nettles
Herbs which contain valuable levels of iron include :
Arctium lappa Burdock leaves
Gentian lutea Gentian
Crataegus spp. Hawthorn
Humulus lupulus Hops
Rubus idaeus Raspberry leaves
Scutellaria spp. Skullcap
Verbena officinalis Vervain
Rumex crispus Yellow Dock
All iron-containing foods are better absorbed in the presence of an animal protein. Vitamin C also enhances iron absorption. Watercress, Rose hips, Blackberries, Blackcurrants, Elderberries, Parsley, Spinach, Dandelion leaves (the list is endless) all contain both iron and vitamin C, and natural iron never causes constipation.
Dizziness
This is common in pregnancy due to relaxation of the blood vessel walls by progesterone. It is a form of postural hypotension. However, this does not call for hypertensives such as Scot's Broom as such herbs may be too strong for both mother and foetus. More frequently seen in early pregnancy.
Change positions slowly.
Eat small meals rather that 3 large meals.
Maintain blood sugar level.
Heartburn
This is one of the most common complaints of pregnancy, caused by reflux of gastric contents into the esophagus due to back pressure. The treatment approach is discussed in the section on gastritis and reflux in the Digestive System chapter.
The relaxing effects of progesterone reach the cardiac sphincter, the valve guarding the entrance to the stomach at the bottom of the oesophagus. As a result of this, as the enlarging uterus pushes up against the stomach, small amounts of the stomach's contents are passed into the lower oesophagus. Hydrochloric acid mixed with the stomach contents irritate and burn the oesophagus, and result in an inflammatory process. In more extreme cases, parts of the stomach itself can be pushed up through the diaphragm or into the oesophagus, and cause some degree of hiatus hernia.
Bleeding Gums
Frequently seen in pregnancy. Gingival hypertrophy is also seen in 40% of pregnancies. Follow the topical advice given for gingivitis but not the internal treatment.
Brush gums frequently with a soft brush.
Vitamin C and bioflavonoids complex to 2000mg daily
Headache
Seen in early pregnancy and worse between 3 and 5 months. A few cases may result from eye strain as pregnancy can result in a change in the amount of refractive error. Some cases result from sinusitis. Frontal headaches are seen with hypertension. Please refer to the section on headaches in the Nervous System chapter.
Vaginal Infections
These are discussed in the chapter on immunity and infections.
Hemorrhoids
May occur for the first time during pregnancy or the pregnancy may exacerbate an already existing condition. This is caused by increased pressure and impairment of return of venous fluid in the hemorrhoidal veins by the pressure of the enlarging uterus. Constipation makes the problem worse. Congestion of liver function caused by intake of junk foods, refined flour and alcohol encourage the problem as the hemorrhoidal veins are part of the portal drainage system.
The treatment approach is discussed in the section on hemorrhoids in the Digestive System chapter.
Discomforts of Pregnancy: The Second and Third Trimesters
Stretch Marks
Genetic predisposition is the predominant factor in the development of stretch marks. When new the marks resemble purple striae, and after a period of time they revert to silvery cicatrix. They occur when the skin is stretched beyond normal capacity and elasticity, in this case related to progesterone and rapid weight gain. The tendency to develop stretch marks can be reduced by eating appropriately and using remedies to address the collagen problems in the skin.
Vitamins E, C and B5 (pantothenic acid) can help as well as Zinc. These can all be obtained from the diet. The following are recommended in Herbs for Pregnancy and Childbirth by Anne McIntyre:
Sunflower seeds and oil, pumpkin seeds, wheatgerm, onions, eggs, lettuce, cucumber,
cabbage, radishes, horseradish, rice bran, asparagus, parsnips,
brewer's yeast, whole grains, fish, alfalfa, molasses.
Wheatgerm or vitamin E oil massaged into the breasts, abdomen and thighs daily will reduce the likelihood of marks developing. Calendula oil mixed with wheatgerm oil is especially helpful.
Backache
High levels of progesterone during pregnancy affect the tendons and ligaments throughout the body, having a softening effect which allows them to expand where necessary to accommodate the growing baby. This affects the spine particularly, and the relaxation of the ligaments supporting the spine plus the weight of the growing abdomen pulling on it often causes backache. The characteristic posture adopted by quite heavily pregnant mothers, leaning backwards, places added strain on the lower joints of the spine.
Bad posture will aggravate this. Too much exercise or bending the wrong way will certainly not help, and a rapid weight gain in pregnancy may bring out symptoms of previous damage to the back as increasing strain is imposed upon it. Yoga exercises may be helpful, with the certain asanas being recommended by experts. Rest is important to prevent or relieve backache, especially in the last three months. Deep breathing and relaxation exercises also help. Baths with Lavender and Rosemary can help soothe the pain. Massage of the whole spine with a mixture of Chamomile and Geranium oil can be effective.
Hypertension
Gestational hypertension is characterized by a steady rise in blood pressure after the 28th week of gestation. The general rule for the upper limit of gestational hypertension is 140/90. It may be caused by:
Emotional and physical stress.
Obesity.
Lack of exercise.
Drugs and stimulants.
Diet including processed & heavily salted carbohydrates with inadequate protein intake.
Herbal treatment can do much to mitigate this form of secondary hypertension, but the blood pressure must be monitored closely as it may rise dangerously fast in some situations. Please refer to the section on hypertension in the chapter on the cardio-vascular system.
Exercise: this forces blood through the vasculature and the vasculature will respond by stretching and relaxing if it is healthy and flexible. Brisk walking or swimming is recommended. This works best when a tendency for blood pressure rise is first noted and is not appropriate for very elevated pressures.
Deep relaxation or meditation, please refer to the appropriate section.
No stimulants including coffee, nicotine, cocaine: all are linked to hypertension, restriction of blood flow to the placenta and small-for-gestational-age babies.
Improved diet: good quality protein and fresh fruits.
Increase water intake.
Rest, particularly lying on the left side.
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by David Hoffmann
My first experimental herb red raspberry leaf tea, then I added false unicorn root, and wild yam. The most noticeable change, within minutes of taking the false unicorn root extract drops, came when I was bleeding heavily during my time. I didn't even like to leave the house it was so bad. BUT after taking just 8 drops on my tongue, the bleeding slowed down, cramps disappeared, and each cycle became more regular--start on time and ending right on the 5 day mark, almost at the exact hour it began.
Within 2 months of starting false unicorn, which also helps with infertility, I was pregnant. This was just under 3 months after a miscarriage at 9 wks. Naturally I was terrified history would repeat itself. However, during my recovery time, I settled with the LORD that I would have as many miscarriages or losses as He chose to allow, because I was His vessel, and it was up to Him to give or take. Truthfully, I expected, yea, I believed that I would NEVER again hold a living child of my own in my arms. I took courage in the fact that God carried me all the other times and He wouldn't let me down, ever.
I knew a little about herbs by then because it had become my newest hobby. I devoured book after book on herbs, until I was quite sure that both herbs I elected to take were safe for me and baby. Do NOT EVER take herbs or any other remedies, unless you have peace with God about using them. This is my number one warning and rule by which I live.
Once my pregnancy was confirmed, I continued taking both herbs, along with extra Vit. E and selenium, and iodine drops from the health store. At about 7 wks I ran out of the herbs and missed a few days. Amazingly, as soon as I took them again, I felt immediately much better, and stronger in my womb. The battle for me at that point became trusting the herbs vs. trusting the LORD. I carried my herb bottles with me to take them on time each day-3times a day, and 4 if I felt run down or weak, or crampy/achy in the area of my womb and/or cervix.
This was my 12th pregnancy by the way, so I am sure that my womb and cervix needed all the help they could get. However, the herbal recommendations stated to gradually wean yourself off both herbs starting around 20 weeks. Being a newbie to herbalism, I did as they said, and all was well. In fact, I remember lying in bed, 10 days overdue, wondering if they'd worked a little too well. My only problem during labor and delivery was post-delivery bleeding...I didn't hemmorage, but had very heavy bleeding and was given a RX for some medication to cause my uterus to contract. I took that for several weeks post partum.
Instead of taking the herbs right away again, I fooled around and let them slide. My old symptoms of heavy bleeding returned, but financially we were struggling so much that I didn't want to put any more burden on my husband and did without, all the while feeling like I was a martyr inside.
Around 1 yr. of using NO herbs, I was crampy and in alot of pain, so I pulled out the red raspberry leaves and began drinking the tea, but only during my cycle. When we started talking about wanting another baby, I wasn't sure if I should try using the herbs again or not. We didnt' want to play God, but my husband wanted me to start using them again, not only to get pregnant but to feel better. So we bought them and I was back to my regime. Would you believe that I got pregnant the first few weeks using them again????
This time I was a yr.+older, and heavier to start with. I used the herbs less frequently to save money. Then around 2 mos. I had 2 days of spotting. I was certain a miscarriage was on the way. I pulled out my herb books and read what to do for a threatened miscarriage. Never before had I had any hope of preventing a miscarriage, but this time I felt the LORD had given me help, if only I would use it. So I did. I began taking the false unicorn every hour, and within less than 48 hrs. all the weakness, cramping and spotting stopped. It never came back. With all my heart and soul I believe those God given herbs prevented us from losing our baby.
Because of the post-partum weakness of my womb last time, I decided this time around to use the herbs until baby was born. During the second trimester I researched herbs to assist with labor and delivery, and over the next weeks bought these to use during the last 6 wks of pregnancy. [NEVER NEVER NEVER use pennyroyal, even in a 6wk mixture-one lady I know did this and lost her baby due to placental abruption.] With this baby, I had no ultrasounds, but felt like I did when I carried my twins. When my water broke, and the attending nurses got an echo heartbeat they did a scan. No twins, just a big baby. 11# 4 oz. of baby to be exact.
The dr. expected me to have the bleeding as before, but was shocked that I had almost no bleeding immediately after, and for the next 2 days watched me closely.
I believe the reason was due to the herbs I'd taken for the whole pregnancy, along with the 6 wk. mix I'd made and taken for just 3 weeks. Baby was 3 weeks early. Imagine how big he'd of been if I went late!
The reason I am posting all this now is to give some of you hope, or at least experiment with if you are having problems with miscarriage, irregular cycles, heavy bleeding etc. The rest of this post will include some of the herbs I used and you can research them further online or at the library. PRAY about any herbs BEFORE USE. I am not a dr. and have only shared with you what worked for me. Right now my womb is closed pretty tight, but I know if God wants to reopen shop, He can do it, He will do it if it is His will. Pray for us.
Discomforts of Pregnancy
© David L. Hoffmann B.Sc. (Hons), M.N.I.M.H.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The First Trimester
Threatened Miscarriage
For many who have suffered miscarriage in the past, herbs may prove effective in preventing this from happening again, provided that the foetus is normal and general health, physical, emotional and mental, is good. No herbal remedy will block appropriate miscarriage. Most cases of miscarriage are a natural rejection of a malformed foetus. When it occurs more than once in the same woman, it may be related to a problem on her part, rather than the baby's. In this case it is especially important to build up her general health as well as that of her partner before they attempt to conceive again. To ensure fewer complications, women should take longer at least six to twelve months between pregnancies
Where chronic poor health, inadequate diet, or trauma and stress of any kind have depleted general strength, herbs can provide extra strength and vitality, especially to the womb, and so help avoid unnecessary miscarriage.
If abdominal cramping pains and bleeding occur, medical attention is needed immediately.
Specific Remedies
A number of plants have well deserved reputations in preventing miscarriage. It may be significant that two of them are now endangered species. Important plants are listed here, with the endangered ones in bold type:
Caulophyllum thalictroides (Blue cohosh)
Chamaelirium luteum (False unicorn root)
Cypripedium pubescens (Lady's Slipper)
Dioscorea villosa (Wild yam)
Viburnum opulus (Cramp Bark)
Viburnum prunifolium (Black Haw)
Other plants that have been widely used to prevent miscarriage include Rosemary, Raspberry leaves, Hawthorn, Partridge Berry, Ginseng, Motherwort, Garlic and Fenugreek.
One Possible Prescription
Viburnum prunifolium 2 parts
Cimicifuga racemosa 2 parts
Caulophyllum thalictroides 1 part 2.5 ml of tincture three times a day, building up to 5 ml. three times day
This supplies the following actions :
Uterine tonic (Viburnum prunifolium, Cimicifuga racemosa, Caulophyllum thalictroides)
Nervine relaxant (Viburnum prunifolium, Cimicifuga racemosa)
Anti-spasmodic (Viburnum prunifolium, Cimicifuga racemosa, Caulophyllum thalictroides)
Broader Context of Treatment
Plenty of foods containing vitamins E and C should be eaten. Asparagus and celery are said to be strengthening.
Nausea, Vomiting (Morning Sickness)
It is seen in about 50% of pregnancies, and tends to be worse with each successive pregnancy. In most cases it will subside at the fourth month of pregnancy. The exact cause of is not known but there are various theories associated with it. Two important ones are:
1. The rapid change of hormone levels in early pregnancy, with resultant high levels of progesterone, may be related due to a stimulation of the vomit center in the brain. Progesterone relaxes the smooth muscle throughout the body, including that found in the arteries, and this produces a drop in blood pressure, which may account for the tiredness and lethargy associated with the nausea and sickness. During the first l2-24 weeks of the pregnancy, when most women experience sickness, the hormones are mostly produced in the corpus luteum in the ovaries. After this time the emphasis changes towards production of hormones from the placenta, possibly explaining why the sickness stops at around the time of the change over, l2-l4 weeks. Sickness could also be related to low blood pressure, especially with a relative lack of blood getting to the brain on rising which is caused by high progesterone levels. Getting up slowly will help to relieve this.
2. It may also be associated with low blood sugar, which normally occurs in early pregnancy. The nausea is often relieved through raising blood sugar levels by eating small, frequent meals. This should not have a high sugar concentration as sugar in the stomach can aggravate nausea.
Specific Remedies
There are no general rules for treating morning sickness, as the causes vary from one woman to another. Treatment should aim at what is seen as the underlying cause. Anti-emetics are important as they will reduce the vomit reflex whatever the cause. Valuable anti-emetics that are safe to use in early pregnancy include:
Ballota nigra (Black Horehound)
Filipendula ulmaria (Meadowsweet)
Gentiana lutea (Gentian)
Rosemarinus officinalis (Rosemary)
Many of the herbs which aid digestion will help. The carminative, anti-spasmodic and relaxing nervines are especially important. Examples include:
Cinnamomum aromaticum (Cinnamon bark)
Dioscorea villosa (Wild Yam)
Eugenia spp. (Cloves)
Foeniculum vulgare (Fennel seeds)
Humulus lupulus (Hops)
Lavandula spp. (Lavender)
Matricaria recutita (Chamomile)
Melissa officinalis (Balm)
Mentha piperita (Peppermint)
Rubus idaeus (Raspberry leaves)
Zingiber officinale (Ginger root)
Mucilage rich demulcents such as Chondrus crispus (Iceland Moss) and Ulmus fulva (Slippery Elm) will soothe the whole of the digestive tract. They are both highly nutritious containing many minerals and trace elements and easily digested, ideal for conditions associated with weakness of the stomach.
One Possible Prescription
Zingiber officinalis
Dioscorea Villosa
Ballota nigra equal parts 2.5 ml of tincture at night and in morning building up to 5 ml. if needed
Mentha piperita
Matricaria recutita equal parts of dried herb to make an infusion
1 teaspoonful to a cup.
Broader Treatment Considerations
Eat small meals all day rather than three large meals.
Avoid certain foods or odors that bring on symptoms.
Small starch snacks such as eating crackers in bed before arising.
100-300mg of B6/day.
Maintain electrolyte balance if vomiting is severe.
Constipation
Progesterone relaxes the intestinal muscles and so reduces their power to propel the contents of the bowel towards the rectum and out of the body. As pregnancy progresses, and the weight of the baby and placenta increases, the tendency to constipation is aggravated by the pressure exerted by these on the lower bowel. When the enlarged uterus impedes the circulation to the bowel, the action of the intestinal muscles is also restricted, as it is by any tension or anxiety which a pregnant woman experiences. Intake of iron as a supplement exacerbates or can cause constipation. Eating small starchy meals consisting of refined flour also contributes to the problem.
For more details about the herbal treatment of constipation please refer to that section in the digestive system.
DO NOT USE ANTHRAQUINONE CONTAINING STIMULANT LAXATIVES.
Please consult the section on constipation. Aim for gentle therapy, utilizing the following treatment considerations:
Increase water intake to 8 glasses per day.
Increase exercise, walk 1/2 mile per day.
Increase intake of fresh fruits and some dried fruits such as prunes, raisins, figs.
Increase roughage.
Bulk laxatives such as Psyllium seeds (1 tablespoonful 3 times a day in 1/4 cup juice).
Varicosities
These may occur early in pregnancy but generally get worse as the pregnancy advances. Symptoms vary from painless cosmetically problematic regions to mild or severe pain. Sometimes there may be a varicosity in the labia majora. For more details on the herbal treatment of varicosities please refer to the section in the Cardio-Vascular chapter.
Fatigue and Somnolence
It is normal for some pregnant women to require excessive periods of rest or sleep during the first trimester. Sleep requirements can be as much as 18 hours per day. If the woman is not working or going to school and does not have young children it is advisable to sleep whenever possible. Some women become depressed at their inability continue the normal daily activity levels established before the pregnancy. Women should be counseled that this symptom usually remits totally by the fourth month of gestation. Blood studies should be checked to rule out anemia. Sometimes ingestion of protein will alleviate this symptom.
Avoid herbal stimulants, neurological of metabolic.
Anaemia
The prevention of anaemia is a most important aspect of ante-natal care. Haemoglobin, the iron and protein compound contained in red blood cells (erythrocytes), is responsible for transporting oxygen from the lungs around the body including (of course) both placenta and foetus. If haemoglobin levels in the blood fall, so the body's ability to access oxygen falls accordingly.
During pregnancy the blood volume increases at a faster rate than the erythrocytes multiply, so they are diluted by extra fluid. There is a relative drop in haemoglobin carried by the erythrocytes of about 1 gm to approximately 11 gms. Below this level anaemia is said to exist, and may be identified by lethargy, irritability and breathlessness on slight exertion. Anaemia commonly occurs in the last two months of pregnancy, when the baby takes a high proportion of the mother's iron. It helps to build up iron reserves before pregnancy starts, so that the mother meets the increased iron demands without any problems. A history of menorrhagia would also suggest iron reserves might be low.
The best approach is to increase dietary intake of iron-containing foods. These include:
liver (best only from organically produced meat, as the liver is the detoxifying organ of mammals, and may contain residues of chemicals if it was factory reared),
free range eggs,
dairy produce,
watercress,
dried apricots,
whole-wheat bread,
cocoa and carob,
cabbage,
alfalfa,
beetroot,
cherries,
currants and raisins,
brown rice,
kelp,
wheatgerm,
sunflower seeds,
parsley,
chicory,
lentils.
blackcurrants, blackberries, strawberries
spinach
Leafy herbs that can be added to salads or cooked as a vegetable and added to soups include :
Crataegus spp. Hawthorn flowers and leaves.
Rumex acetosella Sorrel
Symphytum officinale Comfrey leaves (in moderation)
Taraxacum officinale Dandelion leaves
Urtica dioica Nettles
Herbs which contain valuable levels of iron include :
Arctium lappa Burdock leaves
Gentian lutea Gentian
Crataegus spp. Hawthorn
Humulus lupulus Hops
Rubus idaeus Raspberry leaves
Scutellaria spp. Skullcap
Verbena officinalis Vervain
Rumex crispus Yellow Dock
All iron-containing foods are better absorbed in the presence of an animal protein. Vitamin C also enhances iron absorption. Watercress, Rose hips, Blackberries, Blackcurrants, Elderberries, Parsley, Spinach, Dandelion leaves (the list is endless) all contain both iron and vitamin C, and natural iron never causes constipation.
Dizziness
This is common in pregnancy due to relaxation of the blood vessel walls by progesterone. It is a form of postural hypotension. However, this does not call for hypertensives such as Scot's Broom as such herbs may be too strong for both mother and foetus. More frequently seen in early pregnancy.
Change positions slowly.
Eat small meals rather that 3 large meals.
Maintain blood sugar level.
Heartburn
This is one of the most common complaints of pregnancy, caused by reflux of gastric contents into the esophagus due to back pressure. The treatment approach is discussed in the section on gastritis and reflux in the Digestive System chapter.
The relaxing effects of progesterone reach the cardiac sphincter, the valve guarding the entrance to the stomach at the bottom of the oesophagus. As a result of this, as the enlarging uterus pushes up against the stomach, small amounts of the stomach's contents are passed into the lower oesophagus. Hydrochloric acid mixed with the stomach contents irritate and burn the oesophagus, and result in an inflammatory process. In more extreme cases, parts of the stomach itself can be pushed up through the diaphragm or into the oesophagus, and cause some degree of hiatus hernia.
Bleeding Gums
Frequently seen in pregnancy. Gingival hypertrophy is also seen in 40% of pregnancies. Follow the topical advice given for gingivitis but not the internal treatment.
Brush gums frequently with a soft brush.
Vitamin C and bioflavonoids complex to 2000mg daily
Headache
Seen in early pregnancy and worse between 3 and 5 months. A few cases may result from eye strain as pregnancy can result in a change in the amount of refractive error. Some cases result from sinusitis. Frontal headaches are seen with hypertension. Please refer to the section on headaches in the Nervous System chapter.
Vaginal Infections
These are discussed in the chapter on immunity and infections.
Hemorrhoids
May occur for the first time during pregnancy or the pregnancy may exacerbate an already existing condition. This is caused by increased pressure and impairment of return of venous fluid in the hemorrhoidal veins by the pressure of the enlarging uterus. Constipation makes the problem worse. Congestion of liver function caused by intake of junk foods, refined flour and alcohol encourage the problem as the hemorrhoidal veins are part of the portal drainage system.
The treatment approach is discussed in the section on hemorrhoids in the Digestive System chapter.
Discomforts of Pregnancy: The Second and Third Trimesters
Stretch Marks
Genetic predisposition is the predominant factor in the development of stretch marks. When new the marks resemble purple striae, and after a period of time they revert to silvery cicatrix. They occur when the skin is stretched beyond normal capacity and elasticity, in this case related to progesterone and rapid weight gain. The tendency to develop stretch marks can be reduced by eating appropriately and using remedies to address the collagen problems in the skin.
Vitamins E, C and B5 (pantothenic acid) can help as well as Zinc. These can all be obtained from the diet. The following are recommended in Herbs for Pregnancy and Childbirth by Anne McIntyre:
Sunflower seeds and oil, pumpkin seeds, wheatgerm, onions, eggs, lettuce, cucumber,
cabbage, radishes, horseradish, rice bran, asparagus, parsnips,
brewer's yeast, whole grains, fish, alfalfa, molasses.
Wheatgerm or vitamin E oil massaged into the breasts, abdomen and thighs daily will reduce the likelihood of marks developing. Calendula oil mixed with wheatgerm oil is especially helpful.
Backache
High levels of progesterone during pregnancy affect the tendons and ligaments throughout the body, having a softening effect which allows them to expand where necessary to accommodate the growing baby. This affects the spine particularly, and the relaxation of the ligaments supporting the spine plus the weight of the growing abdomen pulling on it often causes backache. The characteristic posture adopted by quite heavily pregnant mothers, leaning backwards, places added strain on the lower joints of the spine.
Bad posture will aggravate this. Too much exercise or bending the wrong way will certainly not help, and a rapid weight gain in pregnancy may bring out symptoms of previous damage to the back as increasing strain is imposed upon it. Yoga exercises may be helpful, with the certain asanas being recommended by experts. Rest is important to prevent or relieve backache, especially in the last three months. Deep breathing and relaxation exercises also help. Baths with Lavender and Rosemary can help soothe the pain. Massage of the whole spine with a mixture of Chamomile and Geranium oil can be effective.
Hypertension
Gestational hypertension is characterized by a steady rise in blood pressure after the 28th week of gestation. The general rule for the upper limit of gestational hypertension is 140/90. It may be caused by:
Emotional and physical stress.
Obesity.
Lack of exercise.
Drugs and stimulants.
Diet including processed & heavily salted carbohydrates with inadequate protein intake.
Herbal treatment can do much to mitigate this form of secondary hypertension, but the blood pressure must be monitored closely as it may rise dangerously fast in some situations. Please refer to the section on hypertension in the chapter on the cardio-vascular system.
Exercise: this forces blood through the vasculature and the vasculature will respond by stretching and relaxing if it is healthy and flexible. Brisk walking or swimming is recommended. This works best when a tendency for blood pressure rise is first noted and is not appropriate for very elevated pressures.
Deep relaxation or meditation, please refer to the appropriate section.
No stimulants including coffee, nicotine, cocaine: all are linked to hypertension, restriction of blood flow to the placenta and small-for-gestational-age babies.
Improved diet: good quality protein and fresh fruits.
Increase water intake.
Rest, particularly lying on the left side.
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by David Hoffmann
Saturday, July 19, 2008
Sunday, June 22, 2008
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
Serving Others
Once upon a time, before we had children, my husband and I made choices about what we would teach or require our children to do.
We took parenting as a serious committment. If God chose to entrust us with children, we would be accountable for the way in which we raise them.
Our most important goal was/is that they would love the LORD and serve Him with joy and their wholehearts. How to do this was the question.
Many preachers emphasized the correlation between earthly parents and Our Heavenly Father. With that in mind, the light bulb lit! We determined that we would teach our children by example as much as possible, and train them to follow our example.
Training began when they were wee babes in arm. Daddy would often hold them during Bible reading, and pray with them at bed times and meals, folding their little hands and bowing their heads for them. It became second nature to them to pray this way.
Service was the harder part. The work continues today. But please bear with me as I give testimony of the goodness of God and His blessing us in spite of our often selfish motivation.
Over the past few months we have been enjoying missionaries on deputation/furlough. It has been a season of full days for us. This is a novelty because in times past, we would go for months, or even years with only a little company here and there. Though we can't support them financially on a regular basis, we consider it a great privilege to offer a place to sleep, good food to eat, and all the fellowship they can take.
Imagine how delighted my 18yr. daughter was to be told she "is an excellent kitchen manager"
My Mom commented after her last visit that our children " make her feel special because they serve her"
Let me assure you that I do not take credit for the glory given. It is all the LORDS.
Sometimes as a mom/dad you teach and tell, and teach and tell, and show and... It all seems to go in one ear and out the other. You watch your child falter, fail, forget, and fuss, until all looks hopeless. I cant tell you how many times I have wondered how my child will turn out. I can't count how often I wanted to give up on being tough and a parent, and just be a fun, nice Mom who is a friend to her child. I'm glad I/we were able to hang on to our parenting job-which if a grave responsibility-even when we wanted to quit. Waiting to reap was the harder part....you keep thinking when will they get it, when does it get easier? The answer, none of us like, is in time-weeks, months, years.
Below is a partial list of things we required our children to do (as they were of age/able):
We took parenting as a serious committment. If God chose to entrust us with children, we would be accountable for the way in which we raise them.
Our most important goal was/is that they would love the LORD and serve Him with joy and their wholehearts. How to do this was the question.
Many preachers emphasized the correlation between earthly parents and Our Heavenly Father. With that in mind, the light bulb lit! We determined that we would teach our children by example as much as possible, and train them to follow our example.
Training began when they were wee babes in arm. Daddy would often hold them during Bible reading, and pray with them at bed times and meals, folding their little hands and bowing their heads for them. It became second nature to them to pray this way.
Service was the harder part. The work continues today. But please bear with me as I give testimony of the goodness of God and His blessing us in spite of our often selfish motivation.
Over the past few months we have been enjoying missionaries on deputation/furlough. It has been a season of full days for us. This is a novelty because in times past, we would go for months, or even years with only a little company here and there. Though we can't support them financially on a regular basis, we consider it a great privilege to offer a place to sleep, good food to eat, and all the fellowship they can take.
Imagine how delighted my 18yr. daughter was to be told she "is an excellent kitchen manager"
My Mom commented after her last visit that our children " make her feel special because they serve her"
Let me assure you that I do not take credit for the glory given. It is all the LORDS.
Sometimes as a mom/dad you teach and tell, and teach and tell, and show and... It all seems to go in one ear and out the other. You watch your child falter, fail, forget, and fuss, until all looks hopeless. I cant tell you how many times I have wondered how my child will turn out. I can't count how often I wanted to give up on being tough and a parent, and just be a fun, nice Mom who is a friend to her child. I'm glad I/we were able to hang on to our parenting job-which if a grave responsibility-even when we wanted to quit. Waiting to reap was the harder part....you keep thinking when will they get it, when does it get easier? The answer, none of us like, is in time-weeks, months, years.
Below is a partial list of things we required our children to do (as they were of age/able):
- Chores-these were started as soon as baby was able to understand "pick up you ....", and as they grew stronger, more capable, bigger tasks were added. Picking up toys, making bed (even if it looked bad), folding washcloths/socks, and emptying trash cans, and dishwasher. Once able each child cleared their place at the table, vacuumed, mopped, swept..... With their growth came added/harder chores--washing dishes, mowing grass, making beds properly.
- Community Service--picking up litter near our home, helping neighbors without pay, ministry
- Company--when adults came to visit, clean-up rested on their shoulders (they were around 12 when we started that); quietness to allow adults to converse; babysitting younger ones giving moms/dads a break to be with grownups. Service--greet guests, welcome them, meet their needs as much as possible.
Going back now to the correlation between God the Father and our earthly parents, this was used as a jumping off point for teaching our children to serve us, and more importantly their Dad. Get his food and drink, his slippers, see to his comfort and needs, do anything within their ability to help him, please him, and love him. My husband requires them to do the same with me.
One off-beat thing my husband came up with having them do, to honor their parents, was letting them make-up our room in the mornings. I can hear the shocked "whats?" I said, I thought the same thing. Weird huh? My husband and I had a few fights about this, let me tell ya. It didn't go over well with me, at first either. Many people who hear it think it is..... unfair.
The reasoning behind this is the same as the preachers. They say if you can't honor your earthly parents, if you can't obey authority you can see, how will you honor and obey those you can't see? Meaning God of course.
Once I got over my worrying about what other people would think about any of the stuff we require our children to do, and once I got past feeling guilty for my not doing it all myself, I was able to see the wisdom in my husband's decisions.
I wish I could tell you that I was a dutiful and submissive wife who sweetly went along with the plan, without fear or worry as to whether the children would be bitter, hate us, etc. but I wasn't. Up until recently it was, in fact, one of my greatest fears. And it was proven true to a degree several months ago. However, the real root of the child's problem(s) was/is not over doing chores, in fact, he/she isn't able to be still too long and has to be doing something.
No, his/her problem is rebellion--against Dad. He/she acted as though he/she believes Dad is wrong on many counts, and he/she passed judgment on Dad based upon his/her own opinions. This even came to the point he/she had to leave home.
Now he/she has begun to see the error in thought, attitude, and actions. Praise the LORD! He/she has even phoned home to thank Dad for teaching him/her to work, to serve.... This one has a ways to go, but God is faithful and will continue to work in his/her heart and life.
God has promised us that His word will not return unto Him void, that it will do what He wills. Though things with our child and the rest of the family will never be the same, ( and maybe that is a good thing too) The Word of God which was instilled in this child, from conception to this day, will return to the LORD doing what HE wills. We are trusting Him.
Serving others, serving the LORD God in any way, shape or form, whether big or small, begins in the home, serving those we can see, and touch. IT can be a form of worship and bring glory to God if it is performed with the right spirit and attitude.
If you are struggling today, wondering will I ever see GOOD fruit, will it ever sink in--I am telling you today, YES! YOU WILL. YES! IT WILL.
Sunday, May 11, 2008
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Latest from the Homefront
Friday, April 18, 2008
Latest from the Homefront
Since I posted much about our son, in a pretty negative light, I would like to post some good stuff. Right now he is sweating it out, literally, in Honduras. If you go to the orphanage/mission site, our son can be seen welding, carry a huge rock on his shoulder, and yes, he is the one in the tree tying the tire swing up. The orphanage buildings are coming along, but the heat is taking a heavy toll and slowing the work down. Most of the folks are northerners, and just emerging from winter temperatures.
You can look back in the archives, around Nov. Dec. -2007 and Jan/Feb 2008 and you will see my lamentable posts requesting prayer for broken fellowship with friends of our family for 10 yrs. I am HAPPY to report, that although we will never hash out all the reasons behind what was said, done, and thought-past & present, The LORD has given us all an extra measure of His Grace for restoration with these folks. Truly, I am the one who is struggling most with my feelings of wanting to know why, but in a way not really wanting to know. Like Paul, putting those things behind..., we have to choose-- do we want to hold on to being right about a statement/situation that we thing was wrong/handled wrongly, OR do we seek the LORD's mind on the matter, and ask him to help us to forgive, forget and be fruitful? We have to make a choice between becoming BITTER or BETTER. In our flesh, with both hands tightly clenched, we want to hold onto being right (even when we find out we were really wrong, or think so), because in the beginning, it feels good, but it all turns bitter in the end. The one who loses the most is not the one who wronged us, or who we think wronged us. It's US who misses out on blessings, friendships etc. God had enabled us to choose to become better, not bitter.
In a few weeks our twins will be graduating from high school. When David graduated it was really hard on me. When people asked how many children we had, and then found out that we homeschooled too, they would almost always look at me in amazement. Being used to schooling 6, feeding 6, getting 6 up..... I knew downsizing to 5 would be strange. The first day of school the following year was strange. I kept feeling like somethign was missing..it was someone. On top of that, he was going to go out to A SCHOOL for the first time ever, and all the worst thoughts and fears came to mind. It wasn' that I doubted God's ability to protect him, but rather his propensity to follow along. Overall he did ok. I am sure that some of the pressure from school had an effect on the recent choices he made, both good and bad.
Graduation is sand in the hourglass to me. Besides making me think about my age, it makes me take inventory of my life. What will I leave behind when God calls me Home? Will people be changed for the better because I was a part of their life?
2008-2009 will be the most dramatic drop in students to date. Each year is passing like a vapour. Truthfully I don't like it. Before too long, my years of homeschooling will be behind me. I used to think glorious thought of what it will be like to have free time to sew, bake, read, write....all without the pressure of trying to put in our 180 days in a manner that was acceptable to the powers that be...now I am not so sure those days will be glorious, in the sense that the structure, what little we have, that has been in place since 1990, and I had only been out of school myself since 1983, will be gone. Perhaps some of my children will live close-by. My children tell me quite often that they will be bringing their babies to me for schooling, so I suppose I have not been such a mean teacher after all.
All I can do is trust the LORD to use me, and comfort me in the day ahead. Only HE knows what lies before me.
Latest from the Homefront
Since I posted much about our son, in a pretty negative light, I would like to post some good stuff. Right now he is sweating it out, literally, in Honduras. If you go to the orphanage/mission site, our son can be seen welding, carry a huge rock on his shoulder, and yes, he is the one in the tree tying the tire swing up. The orphanage buildings are coming along, but the heat is taking a heavy toll and slowing the work down. Most of the folks are northerners, and just emerging from winter temperatures.
You can look back in the archives, around Nov. Dec. -2007 and Jan/Feb 2008 and you will see my lamentable posts requesting prayer for broken fellowship with friends of our family for 10 yrs. I am HAPPY to report, that although we will never hash out all the reasons behind what was said, done, and thought-past & present, The LORD has given us all an extra measure of His Grace for restoration with these folks. Truly, I am the one who is struggling most with my feelings of wanting to know why, but in a way not really wanting to know. Like Paul, putting those things behind..., we have to choose-- do we want to hold on to being right about a statement/situation that we thing was wrong/handled wrongly, OR do we seek the LORD's mind on the matter, and ask him to help us to forgive, forget and be fruitful? We have to make a choice between becoming BITTER or BETTER. In our flesh, with both hands tightly clenched, we want to hold onto being right (even when we find out we were really wrong, or think so), because in the beginning, it feels good, but it all turns bitter in the end. The one who loses the most is not the one who wronged us, or who we think wronged us. It's US who misses out on blessings, friendships etc. God had enabled us to choose to become better, not bitter.
In a few weeks our twins will be graduating from high school. When David graduated it was really hard on me. When people asked how many children we had, and then found out that we homeschooled too, they would almost always look at me in amazement. Being used to schooling 6, feeding 6, getting 6 up..... I knew downsizing to 5 would be strange. The first day of school the following year was strange. I kept feeling like somethign was missing..it was someone. On top of that, he was going to go out to A SCHOOL for the first time ever, and all the worst thoughts and fears came to mind. It wasn' that I doubted God's ability to protect him, but rather his propensity to follow along. Overall he did ok. I am sure that some of the pressure from school had an effect on the recent choices he made, both good and bad.
Graduation is sand in the hourglass to me. Besides making me think about my age, it makes me take inventory of my life. What will I leave behind when God calls me Home? Will people be changed for the better because I was a part of their life?
2008-2009 will be the most dramatic drop in students to date. Each year is passing like a vapour. Truthfully I don't like it. Before too long, my years of homeschooling will be behind me. I used to think glorious thought of what it will be like to have free time to sew, bake, read, write....all without the pressure of trying to put in our 180 days in a manner that was acceptable to the powers that be...now I am not so sure those days will be glorious, in the sense that the structure, what little we have, that has been in place since 1990, and I had only been out of school myself since 1983, will be gone. Perhaps some of my children will live close-by. My children tell me quite often that they will be bringing their babies to me for schooling, so I suppose I have not been such a mean teacher after all.
All I can do is trust the LORD to use me, and comfort me in the day ahead. Only HE knows what lies before me.
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Monday, April 7, 2008
Moving In
Welcome
This is my new blog. You have arrived on my doorstep because The LORD wanted to you to come. A web search, coutesy or email link, or redirection from my other blog or websites, my have gotten you here cyberically speaking, but it was not a mistake, not a coincidence. It was Divine direction. Please don't take that wrong, I don't mean to imply that I or my site are anything special, however some little word of encouragement, testimony, or challenge posted here must be just what you need to "hear" today. That is my hearts prayer with all my writing endeavors, to bless and edify the reader, to glorify God and lift up my Saviour, the Blessed Lord Jesus Christ. Neither is there salvation in any other...religion, belief system, atheistic, humanistic theories and worldy philosophies. It is only by the shed blood of the Lamb of God, offered once for all, that I KNOW that I have a home in heaven, and that I will see my Jesus one day.
If you do not have this same hope, if you do not have forgiveness of your sins, here is a lesson in true, eternal forgiveness for you.
My prayer is that all those who visit me on this site will have the same assurance of Everlasting Life that I have, not because of works of righteousness which I have done, but the sacrifice of the Perfect Lamb on my behalf.
Over the next little while I will be moving posts from my old site(s) to this one, and posting them on appropriate pages here (or on my other blogs hosted by blogger/blogspot.com) Please stop by anytime, and feel free to roam around. None of the doors are locked, the lights are always on, stay as long as you like, eat what you like and spit out the bones.
This is my new blog. You have arrived on my doorstep because The LORD wanted to you to come. A web search, coutesy or email link, or redirection from my other blog or websites, my have gotten you here cyberically speaking, but it was not a mistake, not a coincidence. It was Divine direction. Please don't take that wrong, I don't mean to imply that I or my site are anything special, however some little word of encouragement, testimony, or challenge posted here must be just what you need to "hear" today. That is my hearts prayer with all my writing endeavors, to bless and edify the reader, to glorify God and lift up my Saviour, the Blessed Lord Jesus Christ. Neither is there salvation in any other...religion, belief system, atheistic, humanistic theories and worldy philosophies. It is only by the shed blood of the Lamb of God, offered once for all, that I KNOW that I have a home in heaven, and that I will see my Jesus one day.
If you do not have this same hope, if you do not have forgiveness of your sins, here is a lesson in true, eternal forgiveness for you.
My prayer is that all those who visit me on this site will have the same assurance of Everlasting Life that I have, not because of works of righteousness which I have done, but the sacrifice of the Perfect Lamb on my behalf.
Over the next little while I will be moving posts from my old site(s) to this one, and posting them on appropriate pages here (or on my other blogs hosted by blogger/blogspot.com) Please stop by anytime, and feel free to roam around. None of the doors are locked, the lights are always on, stay as long as you like, eat what you like and spit out the bones.
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